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One of single moms’ most common frustrations — and by frustrations, I mean ENRAGEMENTS — is dads who don’t stick to visitation schedules. This might mean they fail to show up for scheduled visits, cancel at the last minute — or show up unannounced, or ask for last-minute visits, messing up your life and plans.

Corrie Sirkin, a family law attorney, mediator, and divorced mom from Manassas, Va., says she frequently deals with fathers who show up late or simply don’t show up at all.   

“As a single mom myself, I know how frustrating these issues can be,” Sirkin says. “We have to continue to put our children first and foremost and try to make their lives as conflict free as possible.”

So, what do you do when there is a change in visitation?

Last-minute visitation changes: How to handle

There are plenty of good, common reasons for last-minute visitation change: a medical emergency, parents who agree to be flexible with each other regarding work schedules, or other mutually respected explanations. However, mothers often complain that fathers keep canceling visits, and dads often say that primary-custody moms deny them visits. 

Parent cancels visits

In a solid co-parenting relationship, if one parent needs some backup, they may be able to ask the other parent if they can step in and help, and/or switch up the schedule. 

However, many co-parents have too contentious of a relationship, and one parent may just not show up — or cancels the visit and refuses to see the child. Alternatively, the custodial parent may cancel the visit, prohibiting the other parent from using their visitation time. 

In either case, the advice is to document the cancellation. This can be useful if you choose to pursue your custody case in court. 

The real fall-out in these situations is for the kids, who are caught in the middle of their parents’ dispute. Kids can feel confused about their schedule, hurt and abandoned by the non-custodial parent (regardless of who is at fault for the missed visit), and otherwise not benefit from two parents who love and are committed to them.

Dr. Sarah Kendrick, a Licensed Clinical Psychologist with Thriveworks in San Francisco, says frequent schedule changes can be difficult for the child, since children need some level of stability. However, the best approach is to speak to children in ways they’ll understand — and don’t throw your ex under the bus. 

“You’re only in control of how you react,” Kendrick says. “Choose to react in the best way that you can, at least for your kids. Simply tell them there is a change in the schedule and the new schedule for now looks like X.”

A definitive list of 7 co-parenting boundaries you need to know

Parent doesn’t show for visitation 

Sirkin says if a parent regularly doesn’t show up, the court can order that both parents use a co-parenting app that uses location services on iPhone or Android and has check-ins to prove whether someone is on time.

Once you have documentation of the issue, you can ask the court to modify the parenting time and child support orders to reflect actual parenting time and increase child support.  

“Sometimes fathers will request more parenting time simply to reduce their child support obligation rather than really wanting to spend more time with their children,” Sirkin says. 

She says even if the father isn’t purposely blowing off visits — for example, if he’s absent minded or irresponsible — he’s still causing problems for the mother, who is relying on a consistent schedule and has to make alternate arrangements when he doesn’t show up.  

“If someone consistently doesn’t show up, you can also ask the court to change the agreement so he is responsible for the costs of a babysitter or similar childcare costs,” Sirkin says. 

Late for visitation: How to handle

Ultimately, it is not your responsibility to teach him how to be a good dad or manipulate him into showing up. He is an adult, a parent, and that is his responsibility. But see what you can do to facilitate visits, even if it means doing more than you already are (which is no doubt a lot).

Parent late for visitation

When the other parent is late for visitation, Sirkin says you should send a message to the parent stating: 

“It is now 6:30 P.M., you have not arrived yet. When are you going to arrive?”

She recommends keeping a paper calendar specifically for parenting time that documents cancellations or late arrivals, including when you were notified. 

For example: 

October 1: 6:30 P.M. scheduled time, arrived at 7:14 P.M., notified at 7:05 P.M. 

October 15: no show no call

Visitation schedule manipulation: What to do

If your ex doesn’t respect the schedule you’ve put into place and shows up at will, there are steps you can take — sometimes uncomfortable ones — to ensure he plays by the rules.

Kendrick recommends first trying to communicate your concerns and needs to your ex, without involving the courts. 

If that doesn’t work? This is what you should do: 

Parent shows up unannounced 

If he shows up on, say, Saturday evening and asks to take the kids for ice cream, even though his visit is not until Wednesday, answer the door. Try not to let the kids see, but accept that they might. Tell him that this is the last time you are opening the door for a time that is outside of his visitation.

Let him leave. The end. See ya Wednesday!

If he doesn’t leave?

Be prepared to call the police. Then call your lawyer — or find one via a friend.

I do not say that lightly. Early in my divorce, I had to call the police. I think there are lots of times people call the police during divorces that are unwarranted. Just because you’re really angry doesn’t mean that the cops need to be called. 

However, sometimes the other party just doesn’t understand that because he used to live in the house that is now yours, that he can’t just be there when he wants — and will not leave your apartment. Or, just because children with whom he shares joint custody live in a building, that he isn’t allowed to have keys to that building. In my case, I couldn’t make the other person understand those basic concepts. But a couple of giant, burly officers’ presence did make him understand.

So: Be prepared to call the police, and file a report.

If you threaten to call the police, then you must call the police. He already doesn’t respect you. Empty threats will make that worse.

If things get to this point, then you do need to document this unstable behavior.

Police and courts will likely escalate things, at least temporarily. But they can and do get better. In my case, things got much, much better. But it took outside agencies to impose the rules. It is ugly and embarrassing. For me, a low point. But it had to happen.

Sirkin says if the other parent is not dangerous and circumstances allow, let the children speak with them on the porch or in the yard. 

“Advise him that you have plans and that you will need to leave with the children by a set time, and then leave,” she says.

Ex constantly changing visitation schedule

Occasional and justified visitation change requests are to be expected — for example, if your ex wants to take your kids to visit an in-town relative or has to cancel a visit for a doctor’s appointment. 

However, if you’re dealing with an ex who is constantly canceling or trying to reschedule visits, you may need to get the courts involved.

Here’s what to do:

  • Document everything. Keep a calendar and note all the times he is late, doesn’t show, cancels less than 3 days in advance, or cancels for reasons that are not reasonable — he has a date, is tired, not in the mood, had a fight with his boss, wants to go out, has a friend visiting. Our Family Wizard is the most popular, and most-often court-ordered co-parenting app, in which you can share calendars and document communication and missed or late visits.
  • Go to court and get his visitations reduced. Bring your documentation, explain the effects this has on the kids and your own life, and ask the judge to reduce the number of times each week or month you have to be disappointed and your life upturned.
  • You may need to call your lawyer — or find one via a friend. Online legal services are also affordable ways lots of people can get quality advice.
  • Make him work for visitation: If he wants to see his kids, it can work to make him fight for it (as it stands, he takes visits for granted. Switch it up). It might seem counterintuitive, or passive-aggressive, but as it stands, he takes his time with the kids for granted, and approaches it with a sense of entitlement. Change that up. I tried this, and it worked.
  • Be open to or even ask the judge for therapeutic visits. This means the court orders the dad, the kids, and maybe even you go to therapy.

How to co-parent with a narcissistic or toxic ex — and when parallel parenting is a good idea.

How to make the visitation schedule work

If the non-custodial parent is often not showing up for visitation, sees the kids inconsistently, cancels last minute, or shows up unannounced, this is what you do:

1. Document your visitation schedule

Make sure you have a visitation schedule, and have it authorized through family court. Even if you were never married, you need to get this legally formalized.

Pull it out, make a copy, hand it to him, and tell him that that is the schedule. If he wants to change it, he is welcome to go to court and have it amended. Be polite, but firm. Say: “It is best for everyone if we all stick to a schedule. If it goes well for six months, we can start to be flexible when we need to be.”

Give him the benefit of doubt. Remember: You are changing the dynamic. Change is hard. He thought he could control you, but you are letting him know he can’t. He won’t like this. Give him an opportunity to step in line.

2. Examine the situation

Get honest with yourself: Do you contribute to the situation? You and I might make sure we see our kids, no matter what asshole tries to get involved. But, ask yourself:

  • Do you help create drama at pick-up or drop-off that might discourage your ex from showing up?
  • Do you try to micro-manage his time with the kids, creating a situation in which it’s very stressful for him to parent?
  • Do you otherwise not support him in his parenting? Remember, especially if you have the kids the majority of the time, it can be really hard for even the best-intentioned dads to find a parenting groove, and confidence.

3. Consider changing the visitation schedule

  • While it may not be fair or ideal, one parent may just not be up for the current schedule, and the other parent and the kids deserve consistency 
  • Sometimes, a parent struggles with mental health or addiction issues and needs some support before they can get back to a regular visitation schedule 
  • Occasionally, a parent is unsafe with the kids 
  • Often, a parent’s work schedule prohibits them from maintaining the same schedule, or a regular schedule, and requests some flexibility. However, it can be argued that parenting time is a responsibility and the parent should be required to arrange for child care should work conflict arise. 

The real reason your ex doesn’t see the kids

A dad explains: “Why I don’t see my child”

What to do if you don’t have a visitation agreement?

Go to family court this week, and request a hearing to get one. I also recommend hiring an attorney if you can at all afford one. A DIY online divorce service can be a great, affordable tool to get you the documents and advice you need — whether you were married or not.

You are very vulnerable without a custody and visitation agreement, regardless of whether you were married to your kids’ ex, live in the same state or country, whether you seek/get child support, whether or not he ever sees those kids.

Caveats: OK, maybe you have one of those Gweneth Paltrow dreamy divorces where you both blow in and out of each other’s homes unprompted, are BFFs with the other’s new significant other, and vacation together with your collective broods to the Maldives. Yay you.

This post is for everyone else.

Stop calling your kids all the time when they’re with their dad

Dads, if you don’t follow the visitation schedule, this is why this is totally, absolutely unacceptable:

  • Your co-parent is not a 24-hour bodega. She and your kids are entitled to a schedule, the ability to plan, and to count on a routine.
  • Parenting is not optional. You have a responsibility to your kids, and blowing them off is irresponsible, unethical, and just generally crappy.
  • It breaks your children’s hearts when you don’t show. They will remember.
  • Being lackadaisical about seeing your children sets a horrible example for your kids, and any other children in your life (e.g., your new girlfriend’s kids, or children you now have with another woman).
  • Even last-minute cancellations are horrible. This lets down your children, and shows a total lack of respect for their mother, who is doing the majority of your work in raising them. You are 50 percent responsible for your kids. Every minute more than 50 percent that their mother takes is a favor to you, since you cannot or will not step up. Blowing off your time with your kids is so disrespectful of this service she is already providing for you. When you don’t show up, that means that she has to cancel her plans — including a quiet evening alone with a nice, uninterrupted meal, her shows, and the dog by her side. Or, a date, because she is an adult and she is no longer your wife or girlfriend. Or a workout, or work. Her time is valuable, and you are messing with it and that is wrong.

Question for you, dude: Are you trying to control your kid’s mom by creating chaos in her schedule? Are you jealous of her new man, or otherwise trying to punish her?

  • Everyone needs a schedule. Kids thrive on schedules. Moms need schedules so they can organize their lives. You need a schedule. Dude, you need a schedule. I understand that your work may be unpredictable and harried. But work with your kids’ mom. She probably wants you to be involved.
  • If you do have to miss a visit, IMMEDIATELY offer to reschedule. YOU suggest the new time. Your ex is not your secretary. Say: “I’m really sorry but work called me in this weekend and I can’t see the kids. What do you say that I take them Wednesday through Friday instead? Or, is there another time that works for you?” That shows her that you are serious about your children, that you recognize the value of your time with them — and the impact of missing a visit.

Learn how to co-parent successfully with your ex for the sake of your kids

How about you? Does your ex do this? DID he do it? How did you manage it?

What if a parent is late for visitation?

Ultimately, it is not your responsibility to teach him how to be a good dad or manipulate him into showing up. He is an adult, a parent, and that is his responsibility. But see what you can do to facilitate visits, even if it means doing more than you already are (which is no doubt a lot). And document everything.

What if the parent doesn’t show for visitation or shows up unannounced?

If the non-custodial parent fails to see the kids consistently or cancels last minute, this is what you do: Make sure you have a visitation schedule, and have it authorized through family court.

It is not divorce or separation that harms children — but conflict between parents, no matter if they are married or divorced, studies find.

Penn State University and University of Nebraska at Lincoln sociology professors concluded, after conducting and referencing multiple studies, that biological and adopted children with the highest levels of anxiety and depression either had low-conflict parents who divorced or high-conflict parents who remained together.

Thankfully, it is within your control as a separated parent to lower the conflict in your coparenting.

What are the keys to successful co-parenting?

What does healthy co-parenting look like?

What does inappropriate co-parenting look like?

What is a co-parenting agreement?

Co-parenting FAQs

Bottom line: For the sake of the kids, learn how to co-parent successfully with your ex

What are the keys to successful co-parenting?

Dr. Jaclyn Gulotta, a licensed mental health counselor who specializes in parenting, blended families, child development, families, marriage, and divorce, says successful co-parents work together to focus on what is beneficial for their children in the long term, which includes providing stability and structure. 

She recommends parents:

  • Communicate openly with their children
  • Focus on compromise
  • Avoid talking negatively about the other parent

“Parents should also remember not to compare what other co-parents do and to focus on what works best in their situation,” Gulotta says.

If you’re currently trying to establish a successful co-parenting relationship, we recommend enrolling in an online co-parenting course.

  • Co-parenting and divorce
  • High-conflict co-parenting
  • Basic parenting skills
  • Thrive class in which parents and children attend together
  • High-risk parenting skills
  • Anger management

What does a healthy co-parenting relationship look like?

Anandhi Narasimhan, a Los Angeles child and adult psychiatrist, says healthy co-parenting is about both parents being able to communicate effectively and respectfully to raise their children. 

That means not putting the other parent down in front of the children and working together to help them navigate the transition to a new family dynamic.

“Validating the child’s emotions and discussing with the other parent how to best support the child is important,” says Narasimhan, who recently published a book to help parents understand and form meaningful connections with their children. She says healthy co-parenting also involves both parents actively participating in things like health care, academics, and other key aspects of their children’s lives. 

Sarah Levin Allen, a pediatric neuropsychologist from New Jersey, says successful co-parents put their kids’ needs above their own emotional reactions. 

“It’s about modeling healthy communication and emotional management,” says Allen, founder of Brain Behavior Bridge. “Healthy co-parenting is identifying your child’s needs and pushing that to the forefront of every decision.”

If you’re looking for a guide to navigate co-parenting with an ex, check out Mashonda Tifrere’s Blend, The Secret to Co-Parenting and Creating a Balanced Family. Tifrere shares a 4-year-old son with her ex, music producer Swizz Beatz, and his wife, singer/songwriter Alicia Keys. 

How to set up co-parenting boundaries with your ex

IGNORE when he gets pissy.

DO NOT ENGAGE.

Emily’s tactic:

“It took me a while to release the angry texting habit I adopted once he moved out, criticizing him every time he was late, or his stories sounded fishy about a plan change.

Now I say to myself: ‘And that is why I divorced him,’ and breathe an actual sigh of relief.

I text ‘OK thanks,’ like a robot and get on with my life.”

Our Family Wizard co-parenting app has a ToneMeter that flags any inflammatory words or phrases that you type — so you can delete before you send!

Healthy co-parenting boundaries

Writes Billy Flynn Gadbois, B.S, J.D.:

With co-parenting it is important to focus on the things you can control, and that starts at home. Maintaining a happy and stable environment comes first, and that includes prioritizing your romantic relationships sometimes, as selfish as that may sound. If Mom and Dad are happy, the kids are going to be happy. Trickle-down economics may not work, but trickle-down happiness does. Prioritizing the nest is ultimately the basis of good co-parenting.

If you need help embracing your power and learning to prioritize yourself, I highly recommend you check out my book Kickass Single Mom, Be Financially Independent, Discover Your Sexiest Self, and Raise Fabulous, Happy Children.

Thrive Global

Gadbois continues:

Prioritize your nest, every time. You don’t have to be unreasonable or rigid with it. Its simply calculating a balance with a priority in mind. If the issue will negatively impact the people in your nest in a valid way, the answer is no. If the impact is neutral or the pros outweigh the cons or if it is outright positive for the kids or the coparenting relationship and everyone is comfortable with it, then sure, do it up.

The basic advice about communicating and establishing healthy boundaries with a co-parent — especially in a high-conflict relationship — includes:

  • Stick to practical matters
  • Do not dig up past hurts or arguments
  • Conduct co-parenting communication by text, email or within a co-parenting app like OurFamilyWizard, which has a unique ToneMeter feature to flag any language that will start a fight
  • Give your ex the benefit of the doubt
  • Consider taking a co-parenting class — near you or online.
  • If it makes practical sense, invite into the group chat or co-parenting app step-parents, grandparents, nannies and friends. The goal is to share information, ease communication and share the joys and responsibilities of child-rearing!

What does inappropriate co-parenting look like?

Ineffective co-parenting can include any number of dysfunctional dynamics, including:

  • One parent controlling how the other spends time with the child
  • Undermining the other parent’s authority with the kids, e.g. telling the children they don’t have to follow the other parent’s rules
  • Manipulating the kids to gain their favor over the other parent, to be the “favorite” parent
  • Attempts to undermine the other parent’s new romantic relationship

How to co-parent with a narcissist

To successfully co-parent with a narcissist, you have to set firm co-parenting boundaries about responsibilities and communication, plus have clear consequences when expectations aren’t met, says Jameca Woody Cooper, psychologist and clinical director of Emergence Psychological Services in St. Louis. 

It’s also a good idea to put in place a no tolerance policy for shaming or guilting the children or pitting them against one another, she says. 

“Narcissist parents have a tendency to use these tactics as a way of manipulating their children,” says Woody Cooper, who has also navigated her own divorce and co-parenting relationship. 

Narasimhan says narcissists like to push buttons and make the other parent feel wounded with devaluing statements and passive-aggressive approaches.

“A narcissist often does not have empathy for the challenges and suffering of others — even their own children — so everyone around them suffers psychologically,” she says. 

Narasimhan suggests keeping interactions transactional and not expressing vulnerability when you’re co-parenting with a narcissist. 

“When you feel the narcissist is attacking you and putting you down, engaging or arguing just escalates the behavior,” she says. Instead, minimize interactions and seek help from a therapist to heal old wounds. Connect with a certified mental health professional through BetterHelp.com. Read our review.

Allen says it’s important to be able to identify and label common narcissistic behaviors like gaslighting so you can avoid their emotional power. For reference, gaslighting is a technique narcissists and abusers use to control others by distorting their sense of reality (like picking a fight then making the other person believe they started it).

Because you can’t fix a narcissist, Allen says the best response is to arm yourself with knowledge about your legal rights, set boundaries based on those rights, and continue to advocate for your children. That means taking a supportive role and helping them process what’s happening at an age-appropriate level. 

“Try to identify inappropriate behavior without devaluing the other parent’s love. For example, you can say, ‘This behavior isn’t OK. Your parent loves you, but they did not make a good choice. Your parent should not have behaved that way,’” she says. She also suggests using those moments to teach children about loving behaviors and boundaries. 

FamilyTime app reviews in 2023: Is FamilyTime a good app for parental controls?

How to co-parent with a controlling ex

Like dealing with a narcissist, co-parenting with a controlling or toxic ex is about setting and maintaining boundaries, Woody Cooper says. 

“Early on, it is necessary to set the standard that you cannot be controlled and show that efforts to control you as the parent will be met with distance and less communication,” she says. 

She suggests that when the conversation isn’t acceptable, reduce or cut it off (if possible) or communicate only through email. 

“It’s much harder to try to control another person via email,” she says.

Allen recognizes that it can be difficult to separate your emotions from what’s best for your children. That’s why she recommends having a strong support system in place. 

“Get a dream team of support like a therapist, good friends, or a mom group so you have an outlet for your emotional responses as well as a checkpoint to make sure your responses are appropriate and unemotional,” she says. 

In his book, Divorce Poison: How to Protect Your Family from Bad-mouthing and Brainwashing, Dr. Richard A. Warshak challenges the conventional advice that you shouldn’t fight fire with fire. ​​Instead, he teaches parents how to effectively combat an ex who is constantly trying to portray them in a negative light. His strategies help parents preserve and rebuild relationships damaged by a manipulative ex. 

How to co-parent with a toxic ex

Co-parenting with a toxic ex means learning to let go, Allen says. It’s about recognizing that you can’t keep your kids from being put in the middle or being used as pawns in your relationship.

“You need to allow your children to have their own relationship with the co-parent,” she says. “By recognizing that there are things you can’t control, you are better able to support your children and separate yourself emotionally.”

Taking this approach allows children to find their own voice and develop skills to stand up for themselves. 

“Look at the pandemic. We couldn’t save our children from experiencing that, but we can be there to give them resources and model emotion management and coping skills,” Allen says. “Put the experiences your kids will have with your co-parent in this category. Support their emotions and reactions instead of adding to them with your own emotional responses.”For more advice on repairing a strained parent-child relationship caused by a toxic ex, check out this book: Co-parenting with a Toxic Ex: What to Do When Your Ex-Spouse Tries to Turn the Kids Against You.

Even if you have a healthy relationship with your ex, you need a solid co-parenting agreement to address how you’ll make decisions about your children and to work out the details of your parenting arrangement. 

What to do when a parent cancels visits last-minute

What is a co-parenting agreement?

If you are divorced, legally separated, or have filed a parenting plan with courts, you likely have a legally binding parenting agreement as part of the proceedings. If you are going through a breakup or divorce now, you may ask your ex, and/or his attorney, for a co-parenting agreement.

A co-parenting agreement is simply a contract that binds you both to certain items as they pertain to how you will behave towards each other and the children for the sake of raising healthy kids. This may also be called a custody agreement, parenting plan, or a custody and visitation agreement.

You and your other parent may create a co-parenting agreement at any time. You can do this without attorneys, and may choose to file in the courts, or it can serve as a friendly outline of behaviors, schedules and protocol for raising children together.

What is included in a co-parenting agreement?

For purposes of filing for divorce or custody, a court may require the following issues to be agreed upon (or a judge may mandate the following):

  • Weekly visitation schedule
  • Holiday and summer schedules
  • Child support
  • Payment of children’s health insurance and other medical expenses
  • Payment of child care, camp and extracurricular activities
  • Keeping each parent informed about medical, education and other important issues
  • Restrictions on how far parents can live from one another
  • Sharing decisions about religious education

Other items that you may choose to add to a co-parenting agreement can include anything you agree on, including:

  • First rights of refusal
  • Access to grandparents and other relatives
  • Use of a shared calendar and/or a specific co-parenting app
  • Protocol for requesting and negotiating schedule changes
  • The requirement of responsibility for scheduled visitation time. In other words, a parent cannot simply cancel their scheduled time with a child, but must make appropriate child care arrangements in the event of a schedule change
  • Transportation — which parent is responsible for transporting kids from one home to the other
  • Communication — number of hours or days each parent has to respond to an email or text
  • Communication about parent-teacher conferences
  • Time-sharing for birthdays and other life events
  • You know what you and your ex fight about or will likely fight about — get it in writing now!

Recommended shared parenting documentary: Divorce Corp

Kickass Single Mom, Be Financially Independent, Discover Your Sexiest Self, and Raise Fabulous, Happy Children, By Emma Johnson

Blend, The Secret to Co-Parenting and Creating a Balanced Family, By Mashonda Tifrere

Co-parenting with a Toxic Ex: What to Do When Your Ex-Spouse Tries to Turn the Kids Against You, By by Amy J. L. Baker, PhD and Paul R Fine, LCSW

Divorce Poison: How to Protect Your Family from Bad-mouthing and Brainwashing, By Dr. Richard A. Warshak

FAQs about how to coparent

Here are some rules for healthy co-parenting, and FAQs:

Is co-parenting a relationship? 

Co-parenting is a type of relationship, but not a romantic one!

Should co-parents spend time together?

Ideally, co-parents should be able to attend their children’s events without causing the kids anxiety by being friendly, saying hello, and possibly standing or sitting near one another.

Co-parents ideally should be able to attend school meetings, counseling sessions and even family meetings or dinners occasionally to discuss issues, celebrate birthdays and events and show the kids that you are on the same team.

However, that doesn’t mean you need to be friends with your ex.

Should co-parents talk every day?

This really depends on the two of you, and more frequent communication is called for when there is an infant in play, or there is a medical or other high-intensity situation in which both parents want to know what is going on — and are entitled to daily updates. When children are very young, or the separation or divorce is very new it can be helpful to communicate more often. If there is a difficult period — a family illness, a child going through a difficult time, a relocation or other big life change — more frequent communication may naturally happen, or be useful or necessary. 

But there is usually no reason to mandate daily communication between co-parents otherwise. 

How should co-parents communicate?

If yours is a high-conflict relationship, keep co-parenting communication to text, messages within a co-parenting app like Our Family Wizard, or email. However, it can be very, very helpful to speak face-to-face or by phone to work through difficult child situations, share about your personal struggles that may interfere with co-parenting or otherwise check in.

Hiring a mediator, therapist or even inviting a mutual friend to moderate the conversation is perfectly fine.

Bottom line: For the sake of the kids, learn how to co-parent successfully with your ex

No matter how you feel about your ex, it’s important for the sake of the kids to maintain a cordial co-parenting relationship. That includes communicating effectively and setting healthy co-parenting boundaries. 

If you’re struggling to co-parent with your ex or you just want to build a healthy co-parenting relationship, we recommend enrolling in a court-approved class from Online Parenting Programs. 

You can also use a co-parenting app like Our Family Wizard to keep communication in one place and to share important info.

What is co-parenting?

The definition of co-parenting is the practice of two parents working together to parent the kids. While married or coupled parents can and should certainly co-parent amicably, and collaboratively, the term is usually used when navigating divorced and separated families where parents live apart.

What does it mean to co-parent?

Ideally, both parents are actively involved in the child’s day-to-day life, communicate amicably (though you don’t have to be friends to be good co-parents), share the physical, financial, logistical and emotional responsibilities and joys of parenting, and encourage your children to have a warm relationship with the other parent, and their extended family and friends.

What does inappropriate co-parenting look like?

Ineffective co-parenting can include any number of dysfunctional dynamics, including: one parent controlling how the other spends time with the child; undermining the other parent’s authority with the kids; and more.

Should co-parents talk everyday?

This really depends on the two of you, and more frequent communication is called for when there is an infant in play, or there is a medical or other high-intensity situation in which both parents want to know what is going on and are entitled to daily updates.

How should co-parents communicate?

If yours is a high-conflict relationship, keep co-parenting communication to text, messages within a co-parenting app, or email. However, it can be very, very helpful to speak face-to-face or by phone to work though difficult child situations, share about your personal struggles that may interfere with co-parenting or otherwise check in.

What does healthy co-parenting look like?

Anandhi Narasimhan, a Los Angeles child and adult psychiatrist, says healthy co-parenting is about both parents being able to communicate effectively and respectfully to raise their children. That means not putting the other parent down in front of the children and working together to help them navigate the transition to a new family dynamic.

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  • Building materials from renovations like copper pipes and aluminum siding
  • Old aluminum, copper, or cast iron cookware

If you have junk cluttering your home, inside or out, you could actually have a small fortune on your hands — if you know where to take it. Worst-case scenario, a scrap yard can help you get rid of big items you don’t need, and help the environment by recycling them.

Keep reading to learn where you can recycle scrap metal in person and by mail.

Find a scrap yard near me

Alternatives to local scrap yards

Scrap yard prices? What a scrap yard might pay for scrap metal

How do scrap yards work? What to expect when you visit a nearby scrap yard

Scrap yard FAQs

Find a scrap yard near me:

Start in your own community. A quick Google search of “scrap yards near me” will return a list of nearby businesses that accept scrap:

google-maps-usa-image

If you’re scrapping metal, ask which metals and items they accept.

Many yards accept metals like: 

  • Aluminum
  • Iron
  • Brass
  • Copper
  • Stainless steel 

Some may also take items that contain metal, such as: 

  • Door handles
  • Copper pipes or wiring
  • Microwaves
  • Desktop computers
  • Washing machines

Contact your local scrap yard directly or visit their website to learn which types of scrap they accept and their payouts. 

Alternatively, you can use an app like iScrap to locate local scrap yards. The app also provides real-time scrap metal prices to help you know which offers to accept.

If you’ve never been to a scrap yard, here’s what you can expect:

Alternatives to local scrap yards:

If you don’t want to load up your car and drive to a local scrap yard, you can reach out to companies who come to you or provide free shipping to their facility. 

Check out these top scrap yard alternatives:

1-800-GOT-JUNK? review

1-800-GOT-JUNK? is a licensed and insured accredited Better Business Bureau business with an A+ rating.  You can contact them to get rid of of junk as long as it is not toxic or hazardous material, vehicles, or items that two people can’t safely lift. 

Unlike the previous businesses on this list, 1-800-GOT-JUNK does not pay you for your unwanted items. Rather, you pay them a fee to pick up your unwanted items from your home. It’s a good resource for removing items you can’t sell.

Types of junk they accept:

  • Appliances like refrigerators, stoves, and deep freezers
  • Large items like hot tubs, furniture, pool tables, and pianos
  • Bulky items like carpeting, exercise equipment, and mattresses
  • Garbage, yard trash, glass, tires, and construction waste

They also accept electronic scrap such as computers, TVs, and radios.

1-800-GOT-JUNK? will also remove scrap metals from your home, including:

  • Aluminum
  • Brass
  • Cast iron
  • Copper
  • Steel
  • Tin
  • Lead
  • Zinc
  • Nickel

To get started, you can request a no-obligation on-site estimate online or by phone. The 1-800-GOT-JUNK? team will come to your home or business and give you an estimate for junk removal. 

Pricing is based on how much junk you have and how much space it will take up in the truck, vertically or horizontally. Each truck is divided into portions: ⅛ ¼, ½, ¾, and one full load. They also provide pricing for single-item removals.

CJ Environmental review

CJ Environmental provides metal refining for businesses and individuals looking to turn scrap into extra money. The company has an A+ rating and is accredited with the Better Business Bureau. The business is also a member of the INC 500 — an elite group of businesses considered the fastest growing in the United States.

CJ Environmental has three divisions that handle scrap:

  • Gold, silver and diamonds — Accepts and refines gold, silver, platinum, and palladium. Buys diamonds, fine jewelry, raw gold, gold bullion, gold coins, silver coins, silver flatware and more. 
  • Dental — Takes dental scrap like crowns and bridges that contain metals like gold, silver, palladium, or platinum. They do not accept silver-colored scrap or amalgam fillings.
  • Electronics — Recycles computers, laptops, cell phones, smartphones, and parts like circuit boards. These items are refined because they often contain gold and other precious metals.

The company purchases precious metals, dental scrap, and electronic scrap through its subsidiaries, including CashforElectronicScrapUSA.com, CashforGoldUSA.com, CashforSilverUSA.com, Cash for DiamondsUSA.com, and CashforDentalScrap.com.

CJ Environmental and its subsidiaries offer complimentary shipping. You can get a quote for your items before you sell. 

Once they receive and appraise your items — and if you accept their offer — you will receive a paper check by mail or an electronic payment from PayPal. Most payments are processed within 24 hours of receipt.

Boardsort.com review

Boardsort.com accepts and refines electronic scrap or e-scrap such as circuit boards, RAM, computer chips, cell phones, hard drives, and laptops. They are A+ rated with the BBB.

To use Boardsort, you must register for a free account. They do not offer free shipping. You can either ship your items to Boardsort’s Ohio processing center or contact them for their drop-off address in Ohio.

Boardsort offers a list of acceptable items and the price they pay per pound. Categories include: 

  • Circuit boards ($0.20–$40.00/lb)
  • RAM/Memory ($2.00–$20.50/lb)
  • CPU and chips ($2.00–$175.00/lb)
  • Cell phones and tablets ($0.25–$5.25/lb)
  • Batteries ($0.00–$0.10/lb)
  • Whole systems ($0.10–$1.35/lb)
  • Hardware ($0.05–$11.00/lb)
  • Teardown ($0.05–$0.55/lb)
  • Metal ($0.05–$3.25/lb)

You can also request an instant quote online for your electronic scrap. Additionally, Boardsort offers detailed shipping guidance and videos on how to pack and send your things to avoid payment delays.

Boardsort processes e-scrap from the previous week every Wednesday. They pay every Thursday. Payouts come by check or PayPal.

This business has an active Facebook community, is very responsive via email or phone, and offers an on-site forum to ask questions on Boardsort.com.

Peddle.com

Austin, Texas-based Peddle.com trades cars for cash. The BBB-accredited business is A+ rated and was founded in 2004. Whether your car is in good or bad shape, Peddle will offer you a price that you can accept or reject within seven days. Just create a free account and request a free quote online.

Peddle will walk you through questions to determine the year, make, model, and condition of your vehicle. Within minutes, you’ll get an offer. 

If you accept, you can schedule a pickup at a time that’s convenient for you. A Peddle towing partner will come to remove your car and pay you by cash or check. 

Peddle is available in all 50 states. They buy cars, trucks, SUVs, and vans. There are no hidden fees to use this service. And if you have a question about how to handle your title, use the Peddle title guide for state-specific instructions.

Scrap yard prices? What a scrap yard might pay for scrap metal:

If you have scrap metal sitting around, you can recycle it for money fairly quickly. Scrap yards that pay for items will generally give you a price on the spot, but research current scrap prices to make sure you’re getting a fair payout. 

Here are some average prices for popular scrap metals listed on the iScrap app as of August 2022:

  • Gold: $27,200.00/lb
  • Platinum: $13,720.00/lb
  • Stainless steel: $0.35/lb
  • Copper scrap: $2.44/lb
  • Aluminum scrap: $0.50/lb
  • Silver: $307.00/lb
  • Iron scrap: $155.00/ton

To get real-time pricing for metals, you can use resources like:

  • iScrap — An app that shows current metal prices by the pound. You can also see nearby scrap yards and contact information so you can ask any questions you have.
  • Scrap Monster — A one-stop online resource for scrap metal pricing and scrap yards. You can post buy/sell scrap offers in the marketplace and ask questions on the forum, an area on their website where you can post questions and read about scrap metal topics. 
  • Scrap Register — A site that posts scrap metal prices by region. For the most up-to-date pricing, you’ll need to sign up for a paid membership. Yearly plans start at $99. 
  • PriceofScrapMetals.com — A website dedicated to showing the latest scrap metal prices per pound in the United States and internationally.

How do scrap yards work? What to expect when you visit a nearby scrap yard

When you take metal to a scrap yard, the first thing they’ll do is weigh it. Depending on the size of your haul, they may use a small or large scale. If you have a few items in your trunk, you’ll probably be directed to a small weighing area. If you have a truckload, they might have you drive the entire truck onto a large scale.

Your payout is determined by the type of metal and its weight. It helps to know what kind of metal you are scrapping, but if you don’t, the workers at the scrap yard will sort through your metal to determine the type.

After sorting and weighing, you’ll be offered a price based on the current market for each type of metal. You’ll usually be given a ticket that you can take to a cashier to cash out.

Prices can vary by region and demand, so it’s wise to call ahead and ask about current pricing before you make the trip. Also, ask about what they accept to avoid wasting time and money transporting your scrap to your local scrap yard.

Scrap yard FAQs

What do scrap yards pay the most for?

Some of the most valuable items include:

  • Scrap metals like aluminum, copper, brass, lead, stainless steel, and iron
  • Fine jewelry made of gold, platinum, or silver
  • Large appliances like stoves, washers, dryers, and refrigerators
  • Old tools (value increases when you clean them before scrapping)
  • Electronic scrap such as computer systems, cables, circuit boards, and wires
  • Vehicles (any condition) and their parts

What are the latest scrap metal prices?

Prices can fluctuate daily. To get the latest prices, you can use an app like iScrap or contact your local scrap yard directly.

How do scrap yards work?

When you take metal to a scrap yard, the first thing they’ll do is weigh it. Depending on the size of your haul, they may use a small or large scale. Your payout is determined by the type of metal and its weight. It helps to know what kind of metal you are scrapping, but if you don’t, the workers at the scrap yard will sort through your metal to determine the type.

What do scrap yards pay the most for?

Some of the most valuable items include: metals like aluminum, copper, brass, lead, stainless steel, and iron.

A few years ago, I went out a couple of times with a divorced dad whose daughter happens to be the same age as mine. We spent our first date talking about our kids and the challenges of parenting — and realizing we have a lot in common.

For example, we both feel perfectly satisfied having spent our upbringings attending mediocre public schools, running around the neighborhood on weekends, and watching TV on school nights. Yet we stress about getting our kids into the right kindergarten and constantly schlep our unappreciative preschoolers to museums and They Might Be Giants concerts.

“What’s up with that?” we both wondered aloud. I liked this guy. But when he started in on his daughter’s former ballet career, I was a goner. “That class was the best hour of my entire week,” he said, glowing. “I could not get enough of these 3-year-old girls trying so hard to be little ballerinas. It was the cutest thing in the world.” Awkward silence. It was my turn to speak, but instead I was staring. I was staring not at his gym-toned shoulders or adorable, open smile. I was staring at him.

Here’s what you should know about dating a single dad:

Where to find divorced dads to date

Is it hard for single dads to date?

Why date a divorced dad

How do single dads cope with dating? What to expect

What a single dad wants in a relationship

Benefits of dating a single dad

Challenges of dating single dads

How to date a single dad

Where to find single, divorced dads to date

You can find single dads dating everywhere:

  • Online dating sites like eharmony.com
  • Matchmaking services
  • Playgrounds
  • School and other kid events
  • Your work
  • Their work
  • Bars 
  • Clubs 
  • Professional events and conferences 
  • Church/temple/mosque 
  • Around the neighborhood 

Dating a man with kids? What to do if he says, ‘My Kids Come First’

Dating sites to find single, divorced dads

Check out a dating app. This is the easiest, cheapest way to get your mojo back, and get a feel for what is happening out there. All you need to do is connect with one cute guy to get that spark going again.

Online dating is one of the best things in the world for single moms — time and money efficient, and you can even do a background check a guy before you go out with him!

Here is my list of the best dating sites and apps for single moms. 

For finding a serious relationship, a boyfriend or a husband, eharmony is the leader:

  • Free 150-point personality report
  • Apps for iOS and Android
  • 100% of members are proven to be real (no catfishing or married people!)
  • Free version
  • For paid memberships, eharmony has one of the lowest prices, and you can start with a free basic membership.
  • A Better Business Bureau rating
  • Video dating

Learn more about eharmony in my review.

Matchmaker sites for finding single, divorced dads

There is a reason matchmakers have been in use since the dawn of human sexuality — they work!

Matchmakers tend to be very expensive, with no guarantees, but many people have good experiences meeting quality matches.

8 rules for dating a single mom

Dating as a single dad? Advice for single dads you should know

Meet single dads on the playground

Are you hanging out at the playground? Maybe the local pool, or on the sidelines of soccer practice and choir concerts, adjusting tiny choir robes before the kids go onstage? In other words – you’re spending time being a parent. And where there are parents, there are other parents. And where there are parents, there are single parents. And where there are single parents, there are divorced dads. And some of them are hot.

I’ve noticed a steep spike in the number of good-looking, interesting-seeming fathers without wedding rings at all of the above locations in my neighborhood and the soccer league my kids play in. Part of this scene is that the older kids get, the older marriages are. And statistically, that means more divorce.

Sad? Yes.

A delicious constant supply of fresh meat to your single-mom dating pool? You betcha!

As for me, not gonna lie: I’ve found myself flirting with dads from time to time. The next time you decide — in an effort to stay awake during your son’s flute recital — to peruse the auditorium and spot a cute dude, by himself, with a naked left-ring finger, here’s what to do:

1. Hang out nearby. I mean, don’t be weird. But find a reason to get up in that. Say, encourage your kid to ride the same merry-go-round, or belly up to the same doughnut-and-coffee table after the play. Remember: If you feel awkward as a single parent in a married-parent world, he does, too. You’re doing him a favor.

2. Be friendly. But normal. Don’t be aggressive – dudes hate that. Try smiling. Seriously, that is huge. Just smile at him.

3. Say something about the kids. After all, that is the only thing you definitely have in common at this point. It’s OK if it’s boring. Face it, most talk about kids is mind-numbing. Try: “Where’s your kid go to daycare?” or “Do you rent or own your flute?” 5 tips for dating after divorce

4. Let him know you’re single. After all, at this point you’re not 100% sure he is, too. The most natural way is to talk to your kids about daddy’s house. Kids with married parents don’t have a daddy’s house. “Daddy’s house” is golden code for: “I’m divorced, and I really, really, really hope you are, too.”

Try: “Nope, no ice cream. You’re going to eat dinner soon at daddy’s house,” or “When you’re at daddy’s house I am going to be spending long days in bed with — sorry, what was your name again? — right, with this nice man, Chad.”

5. Embrace the moment. Ok, you’ve established you’re both single parents. AWESOME! Seize on this moment. Within a single second you have confirmed you’re both members of the same secret club with its own language, horrors and, well, more horrors. It’s like you are instantaneous war buddies. Except better, because you didn’t kill anyone and it’s perfectly legal for you to have sex with each other during wartime.

Divorce rates for second and third marriages

6. Keep smiling.  So now you’re having a really fantastic conversation about retainer fees and visitation schedules that no one else by the swingset could possibly understand. That’s nice. But smiling means flirting. Do that.

7. Stop smiling. The part where he starts to tear up talking about how much he misses his kids? Act sad at those parts.

8. Time to go! You leave first. Old-fashioned, throw-back to The Rules of the 90s. Trust me on this one.

9. Be cool, but direct. “We should hang out sometime.” Smile. But not weird. Exchange phone numbers.

10. Collect your kids. Get out of there before they act like assholes and undo all your handiwork.

Ready to try online dating? Read why you should try eharmony.

Is it hard for single dads to date?

Since the majority of single dads have their kids the minority of time, it is easier from a scheduling point of view for many single dads to date. That said, some will argue that their high child support obligations mean they have fewer dollars and less time because they have to work so much to pay support. 

Do you give an engagement ring for a second marriage?

Why date a divorced dad?

Most of the men I date are dads, and that is by design. Of course, it’s practical to date other parents. Everyone’s lifestyle is similar. Because moms and dads tend to be less cool than the general population, there are lower expectations to carry on a conversation about indy film, the hottest dumpling joint or world travel.

But mostly I gravitate toward men who are fathers because of just that — they’ve gone through that colossal metamorphosis that only parenthood induces. There is a warmth and wholeness that men without children rarely possess.

Good news is that a lot of men want to date single moms (if you’re one of them, here is my advice to you).

If you’re a mom looking to meet quality men for a relationship, love and marriage (and how to get over your ex already), here is my advice to you.

Thinking of dating again after a long dry spell? Why dating as a single mom is so great, and how to get back out there.

If you’re thinking of exploring friends with benefits, here’s my advice to you.

How do single dads cope with dating? What to expect dating a single dad

Elliott Katz, single dad of two daughters in Toronto, and author of Being the Strong Man A Woman Wants: Timeless wisdom on being a man:

As a single dad, I look for someone who will be supportive of my parenting efforts and doesn’t see my commitment to my children as taking attention away from her.

I also look for someone who is self-supporting. Few single dads I know are looking for more dependents. I also look for someone who doesn’t badmouth her ex. That negativity is a downer.

What a single dad wants in a relationship

David Bakke, single dad of one son in Atlanta, and an online entrepreneur, says:

I don’t want to be rushed, as in I’m not dying to get in the sack with a woman and I’d very much like to get to know you first (this is quite a departure from my younger days, but it’s true).

You having kids would be nice because it would make the interactions with myself and my child that much easier if my kid had someone to bond with, but it’s not a requirement. If you don’t have kids, you need to be able to be comfortable around them.

Finally, I need complete honesty, as in I don’t care if your past is checkered, I just need to know about it. And if you have any extreme thoughts on anything important, whether it be politics, religion, or anything else, a heads up would be much appreciated.

Hey single mom— Do you tell your son he’s the man of the house? 16 tips for raising sons

Benefits of dating a single dad

If you’re a single mom — and even if you aren’t — there are a lot of benefits of dating a single dad:

There are no surprises when it comes to single dads dating

Another perk: you know what you’re getting. A man’s parenting profile is about as transparent of a resume as you’ll find. We can spend all day scrutinizing the way a guy dresses, how he orders his food or how long it takes him to text us after sleeping with us for the first time. But the best measure of his character, personality and partnership potential is who he is as a father.

I’ve met many men whose displays of parenting were aphrodisiacal. One divorced dad charmed me with tales of co-writing children’s books with his tween daughter with whom he regularly makes sushi, while another — an artist who took me to his latest exhibit — proudly showed me spots on canvas where he’d invited his son to take liberty with the paintbrush.

Divorced dads do amazing things for their kids — and that’s hot

I went out a couple times with a guy struggling with his troubled teenage son who suddenly came to live with him full-time after a decade of being an out-of-state parent. He was reluctant to share details, but I was touched by the glimpse of a tenderhearted man doing his best in an impossible parenting conundrum — alone.

It’s these mentions of parental self-doubt, or fighting with exes for shared custody, or pride in a kid’s candid insights that showcase what kind of man a guy is — and what it might like to be with him.

While out for dinner with one adoring father a few months back, I confessed that I am a wimp at bedtime, often caving to my kids’ stalling antics.

“Not me,” he said. “I say good night, and that’s it. I don’t care how much they cry.” Impressed, I asked where that steel came from. “I don’t give a FUCK,” he said. “That’s my time, and they need to go to bed.” Again, I was speechless. I may have uncrossed, then recrossed my legs.

Into older men? Do’s and don’ts for dating an older man

Single dads are busy — and not-so needy

A guy who makes his kids his priority may not have all the time in the world for you — and since you already have a full life, that can be a great thing. Nothing worse than a bored, needy man demanding all your time and attention.

When a happy single dads makes time for you, you know that will be quality time that he carved out of his dynamic life — a life you can benefit from in countless ways.

Single dads are more likely not to want any more kids

If that is also your goal, then these single dads can be a great fit for single moms.

Benefits of dating a single dad, from real single moms:

  • “They plan activities that include the kids.”
  • “They understand the responsibilities and schedule constraints of being a single parent. It’s also good because you can parent vent to them and they understand.”
  • “They understand the unpredictability of raising kids so if something comes up unexpectedly, they don’t get all bent outta shape if you have to reschedule or cancel.”
  • “They have the same single parent dilemmas.”
  • “They are more mature, responsible, and usually more accepting of your personal priorities such as kids/work. They often crave more stable relationships and know how to balance family responsibilities along with the rest of their lives.”
  • “They can relate to the responsibilities of parenting!”
  • “If you’re on the same or a similar custody schedule, you can truly devote your time to each other on your off time to really get to know each other, and he’ll understand when you’re busy during custody time. And then you can slowly introduce your kids to each other when you both feel it’s appropriate. He should also be more understanding when family circumstances arise out of the blue and you need to pivot.”
  • “They don’t want all of your time – they have their own commitments and responsibilities and (the good ones) are great about understanding and respecting yours, as well.”
  • “They are presumably busy with kids, job, and extracurriculars so they won’t smother you too soon.”
  • “I think it is more likely they will be your people. Like have very similar wants and needs as a single mother. You go into a relationship wanting compatibility and generally if you are similar-it is more likely to happen.”
  • “I was actually set against dating anymore single dads due to parenting differences, custody schedules and conflicts etc. and then I met the guy I’m currently dating. Single dad, he is so kind, patient, considerate and helpful. I’m thankful for all the shitheads I had to go through to get to this one because I appreciate him so much. He is the epitome of teamwork and I couldn’t ask for a better partner.”

Challenges of dating single dads

  • They have kids, so might not have as much time as you may desire
  • There may be drama with his ex
  • Kids are expensive — so he may not have a lot of extra money
  • He may want to take the relationship slow — not a bad thing!
  • Because single dads typically have minority time with their kids, they can feel like that time is so precious, and are inflexible about the weekends or days they have parenting time. 

Check out my post on challenges of dating single parents for more.

Beware of these 19 dating red flags

How to date a single dad

PSA: Dads are just like other dudes, except that they have kids that they actually know about!

A few tips for dating single dads that may apply, though of course every dad is unique:

  • Be respectful of his time with his kids. He may be happy to hire a sitter to see you, or he may covet that time with his kids, and you have to work around it. Defer to him.
  • Be mindful that if he doesn’t have his kids 50% of the time, that may not be his choice. Family courts aren’t fair.
  • He’s the parent — not you. If and when you were to blend families, then you can have discussions on parenting styles and compromises. Until then, he decides how the kids will be punished, etc.
  • That said, it is OK for you to respectfully express your feelings about how your time together is managed, and anything in the new family dynamic that bothers you. In other words: He doesn’t get any more say in the relationship than you do just because he has kids.
  • Final tip for dating single dads: Have fun!
Is it hard for single dads to date?

Since the majority of single dads have their kids the minority of time, it is easier from a scheduling point of view for many single dads to date. That said, some will argue that their high child support obligations mean they have fewer dollars and less time because they have to work so much to pay support.

Why date a divorced dad?

It’s practical to date other parents. Everyone’s lifestyle is similar. Because moms and dads tend to be less cool than the general population, there are lower expectations to carry on a conversation about indy film, the hottest dumpling joint or world travel.

Is it hard for a single dad to date?

Since the majority of single dads have their kids the minority of time, it is easier from a scheduling point of view for many single dads to date.

If you have old electronics sitting around your home, you may be able to recycle them for cash for the precious metals they contain. However, the quantities are small, so it usually makes sense if you have a lot of electronics to recycle.

There are roughly 0.016 grams of gold in one smartphone. At today’s gold price above $5,000, per gram, that would be worth about $2.

If you have a lot of electronic scrap at home or in your business, this post will explain:

Table of contents

What is electronic scrap?

Electronic scrap, or e-scrap, describes the valuable parts of electronics after you can no longer use them. Whether you are upgrading a laptop or smartphone, or if you have electronics that no longer work, there may be value in the parts.

These are some common electronics people may be able to recycle: 

  • Cellphones
  • Smartphones
  • Desktop computers
  • Laptop computers
  • Computer monitors
  • Tablets
  • Circuit boards
  • Hard drives (internal and external)
  • RAM memory (IC chips, processors)
  • Printers
  • Scanners
  • Fax machines
  • Copiers
  • Keyboards
  • Mice
  • Docking stations

When you recycle electronics, you should do so responsibly. This means removing personal data from your devices, including laptops, smartphones, and tablets. 

The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) advises you to transfer your data to a safe place such as:

  • Physical, external hard drive
  • New computer
  • Encrypted cloud-based storage service like Google Drive, Dropbox, or iCloud2

After confirming your data is safe, you can erase your hard drive, which is also known as a factory reset. This will erase all data. You can find instructions on how to do this from your device’s manufacturer. 

If you plan to recycle your devices but not sell them, the United States Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) advises using a certified electronics recycler like GreenerGadgets or Call2Recycle.3 These recyclers use responsible, eco-friendly practices and ensure data destruction.

Of course, you’ll want to scrap your items responsibly, and that also means ensuring your personal data is protected. That’s why it’s so important to choose an electronics scrap business that offers secure data removal from the electronic devices you wish to scrap.

Electronic scrap prices

Some parts of your old electronic devices could be made of scrap metals like: 

What you’ll earn when recycling electronic scrap devices changes based on what precious metals are inside, their weight, and the current price of those metals. For example, some electronics components like motherboards, circuit boards and processors, contain more gold, palladium, and copper than other electronics.

For perspective, based on the average smartphone containing 0.016 grams of gold, it would take about 63 smartphones to recover one gram. However, you’d only need 10 laptops to recover the same amount.4 

Where to find a “scrap yard near me” to sell scrap metal

Precious metals in electronics: List of items you could recover for gold and more

Precious metals like gold and silver are used in phones, computers, keyboards and other devices, which means you can get back some money recycling parts and cut down on environmental waste.

Gold in cellphones

You can find gold plating throughout old cellphones and smartphones — especially expensive models. Gold is often used because it doesn’t corrode and conducts electricity well. 

While some parts are plated in gold, others are made of gold. This will vary depending on your phone, but in general you can find gold in or on:

  • Connectors
  • Wiring
  • Circuit boards
  • Chips 
  • SIM cards

According to the U.S. Geological Survey, older cellphones contain about 0.034 grams of gold.5 (though the amount will vary slightly by phone model — newer models contain less gold).

Gold in computers: What computer parts have gold?

Computers are an excellent source of gold because they are larger than cellphones. That means the parts are heavier. The higher the weight in gold, the more money you can make.

You can find gold in:

  • Circuit boards
  • Motherboards
  • Hard drives

The older the device, the more gold it likely contains. That’s because older electronics like VCRs, camcorders, and scanners tend to have larger components.

Start by going through your home to look for unused electronics, and ask family and friends if they have electronics they no longer use or want.

You can also join groups like Freecycle or post an ad on Craigslist or Nextdoor requesting old electronics. 

Electronic scrap yards also have junk computers that you can take parts from, free of charge. Be sure to look for old servers and mainframes from businesses, as they contain multiple hard drives, circuit boards, and motherboards.

Here’s a video on scrapping a computer tower:

Other things to sell for cash:

16 ways to get rid of old appliances
Vintage comic books worth a small fortune
How to thrift vintage handbags
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Gold in computer circuit boards

Circuit boards provide a lot of small, intricate gold parts. These pieces of gold are often woven throughout the boards. Dell Technologies reports you can likely get 5 troy ounces of gold per ton (2,000 pounds) of P.C. circuit boards.6

Gold in computer motherboards

Motherboards — a circuit board that contains the principal components of a computer or other device — offer a lot of gold parts, such as connectors, ports, pins, and sockets. Since motherboards are larger than other circuit boards, you can typically get more gold from them.

Gold in computer hard drives

Old hard drives are full of metals such as gold, silver, copper, aluminum, and palladium. They contain many parts that professionals can extract. Connector pins and other contacts usually have gold plating, as do circuit boards in hard drives.

Palladium in computers

There are very small amounts of palladium in computer parts. You’ll usually find it in hard drives and circuit boards.

Is it worth it? Should you extract gold from electronics?

The following lists the average amount of gold found in common electronic devices and how much it’s worth based on current gold prices, though most electronic scrap buyers won’t pay you the full value of your gold if they have to extract it from an assembled device:

  • Older cellphones – 0.034 grams, about $2
  • Smartphones – 0.016 grams, about $1
  • Desktop computers – 0.2 grams, about $12
  • Laptop computers – 0.1 grams, about $6

23 sites like Craigslist to buy or sell stuff

Where and how to sell used furniture online or locally

Electronic buy-back businesses and programs

Unless you have a large number of old electronics — for instance, if you own a company and want to upgrade all of your office computers — you won’t make a lot of money selling electronics for scrap.

To get the best offer for your scrap electronics, check with an electronics buy-back dealer or program. These places will pay a set price for your unwanted electronics, no matter the quantity.

Amazon Trade-In

Amazon Trade-In pays you for eligible used electronics. In turn, Amazon refurbishes and resells them. If your item is not eligible for trade in, Amazon offers free recycling of your unwanted electronics. You must have or register for a free Amazon account to get started.

Amazon accepts:

  • Smartphones
  • Game consoles 
  • Routers
  • Smart speakers
  • eReaders (Kindle)
  • Media players (Fire TV, Roku)
  • Tablets
  • Home security (Blink, etc.)
  • Video game consoles

Amazon provides:

  • 10-20% trade in promotional discount towards a new device
  • Amazon gift card with the cash value for the offer
  • Trade-in tool to give you an estimate of what your cash offer will be
  • Free shipping via UPS or use an approved local drop-off within 45 days of offer
  • One promotional discount per customer account per 90-day calendar quarter (starting Jan. 1, Apr. 1, Jul. 1, and Oct. 1) 

You can make up to five device trades in one transaction but only two of the same device in a calendar quarter.

What people think about Amazon trade in

Although Amazon is BBB-accredited and has a B rating, it has poor reviews. It has 1.16 out of 5 stars from over 3,700 reviews with the BBB and a 1.7 out of 5 rating on Trustpilot based on more than 29,000 reviews.

On Reddit, some have expressed that the trade in program:

  • Could use better communication in customer service
  • Lost its items during shipping
Amazon Trade-In Program
byu/the_neil_show inamazonprime

But there are others Reddit users with positive experiences trading in electronics. They also noted that Amazon worked to fix any issues when things didn’t go as planned:

How does the trade-in process work?
byu/ClaryVenture inkindle

Best Buy trade-in

Best Buy offers a trade-in program for used electronics at most locations. They accept electronics in any condition except very poor. If the item’s value cannot be found in their trade-in estimator tool, Best Buy offers free recycling.

Best Buy accepts:

  • iPhones
  • iPads
  • Apple notebooks
  • Laptops
  • Samsung smartphones
  • Google Pixel smartphones
  • Microsoft Surface
  • Gaming consoles and hardware
  • Headphones
  • Smart watches
  • Streaming devices

Best Buy provides:

  • Online offer estimator
  • Cash offer issued via a Best Buy gift card
  • Limited-time deals and discounts with trade-ins
  • In-store trading at participating locations
  • Online trading (as approved by Best Buy if your local store does not take trade ins)

There is a three-item limit of same-model electronic devices and a five-item limit for same model cellphones in a calendar year (12 months).

What people think about Best Buy trade-in

Best Buy has been accredited since 1970 and carries an A+ rating but only a 1.08 out of 5 stars based on about 2,000 customer reviews. It doesn’t fare well on Trustpilot either, with 1.3 out of 5 stars from more than 6,700 reviewers. That said, there are thousands of Best Buys around the United States with many loyal customers.

Experiences shared from Reddit users, although few, are mostly positive, and say that the process was smooth, fast, and easy.

best buy trade in experience
byu/bobby_ashfaq inGooglePixel

Buyback Boss

Buyback Boss buys used cellphones in any condition. It also buys a range of other electronics, listed on its site.

Buyback Boss accepts:

  • Smartphones
  • Macs
  • Laptops
  • PCs
  • Drones
  • iPads
  • Tablets
  • Apple watches
  • Game consoles
  • TVs
  • Monitors
  • Cameras

The list of items they buy is extensive, so it is best to use their quote wizard tool to see if your item is listed.

Buyback Boss provides:

  • Instant quotes using an easy online tool
  • A free, prepaid shipping label to mail your devices
  • The ability to sell multiple devices at one time
  • A 14-day price lock on the offer
  • Payouts to your bank, through PayPal, or on a gift card
  • Payments issued once item is accepted and verified (usually takes seven business days)
  • Free return of the item if you don’t accept an updated quote based on condition

What people think about BuyBack Boss

Buyback Boss is accredited and A- rated with the BBB and has 4.5 out of 5 stars from customers. On Trustpilot, it has an excellent rating with 89% of its reviews at 5 stars.

Decluttr

Decluttr has an F BBB rating but a 4.3 stars on TrustPilot where nearly 30,000 people have reviewed it. To sell on Decluttr, you must list at least one electronic item worth more than $5. The company accepts electronics of all conditions (good, poor, or faulty). You must register for a free account online or through the Decluttr app to get started.

Decluttr accepts: 

  • Smartphones
  • iPads
  • Tablets
  • Macbooks
  • iMacs
  • AirPods
  • Headphones
  • Speakers
  • Game consoles
  • Smart watches

Decluttr provides:

  • A free instant evaluation of everything you want to sell
  • A 28-day price lock on the offer
  • Free return of your items if the offer changes
  • Free shipping and insurance through Decluttr shipping partners like the UPS Store
  • Three payment options: direct deposit, PayPal, or donated to your favorite charity

What people think about Decluttr

Decluttr is a BBB-accredited business with an A rating and 2.97 out of 5 stars from customers reviews. It has an excellent rating on Trustpilot, with 4.3 out of 5 stars from over 27,000 reviews.

Some Reddit users say that Decluttr:

  • Changes the cash offer after they receive the items
  • Is not the best place to get top-dollar for your old electronics
  • Is better for getting rid of old DVDs, CDs, and video games
Beware Decluttr
byu/Kimmalah inFlipping

ecoATM Smartphone kiosks

If you’re near one, you can use an ecoATM kiosk to get cash for your unwanted smartphone. There are over 5,000 kiosks across the United States. They are in stores like Walmart, Dollar General, and Kroger.

ecoATM accepts:

  • Smartphones
  • Tablets
  • Mp3 players

Some ecoATMs do not accept tablets. Check the location finder to know before you go.

ecoATM offers:

  • An online payout estimator and a seven-day price lock when you use the ecoATM app
  • Instant evaluation of the smartphone at the kiosk for a final cash offer
  • An instant cash payout when you accept the offer

What people think about ecoATM

On Trustpilot, ecoATM is rated as average with a 3.6 out of 5 stars from over 4,500 reviewers. Currently the BBB profile for this business is being updated.

There’s a lot of talk about ecoATM on Reddit. After combing through several Reddit threads, the consensus is that the company:

  • Sometimes has kiosks that malfunction, taking your smartphone but not giving you the cash and has poor customer service to address the issue
  • Has very low cash offers
EcoATM
byu/honesttryingtohelp inReview
Does your walmart have one of these? “EcoATM” You can give it your older used phone for some pocket change and it will “keep the phone out of a landfill by recycling it” but ive never actually looked into it.
by inAnticonsumption

ItsWorthMore

ItsWorthMore is an electronics trade-in business that also sells refurbished devices. You must create a free ItsWorthMore account to get started.

ItsWorthMore accepts:

  • Smartphones
  • Tablets
  • Laptops
  • Desktops
  • Smart watches
  • Game consoles
  • Graphics cards
  • Cameras
  • Apple audio equipment 
  • DJI drones
  • Virtual reality equipment
  • Monitors

ItsWorthMore provides:

  • An instant quote tool for your electronics
  • A free shipping label to mail your items
  • Expedited payouts via PayPal, Zelle, and digital check within two business days of approval (approval takes four to seven business days)
  • Payouts via physical check in five to 10 business days after approval 

What people think about ItsWorthMore

ItsWorthMore has mostly positive reviews. It is BBB-accredited with an A+ rating and 3.62 out of 5 stars. The business has 4.8 out of 5 stars on Google, 4.8 out of 5 stars in Sitejabber, and Trustpilot reviewers give it a 4.6 out of 5 stars.

One Reddit user shared a positive experience using the service, calling out:

  • Good pricing
  • Fair evaluation
  • Good customer experience
Reddit user shares a positive experience selling electronic on ItsWorthMore.

OCBuyBack

OCBuyBack purchases used electronics but also sells refurbished cellphones.

OCBuyBack accepts:

  • Smartphones
  • Cellphones
  • Tablets
  • iPods
  • Smart watches
  • GoPros
  • Game consoles

OCBuyBack provides:

  • Free prepaid shipping label
  • A box to ship your items (if you don’t have one)
  • 14-day offer guarantee
  • Payment by check or PayPal sent one business day after item receipt
  • Unlimited items to sell (contact them for sales of 50 devices or more)
  • Free returns if you don’t accept the final offer

What people think about OCBuyBack

OCBuyBack is accredited and has an A rating with the BBB with 3 out of 5 stars from two customer reviews. It has an excellent rating on Trustpilot with 4.4 out of 5 stars, but many of the 5-star reviews are from people who submitted one review on Trustpilot. It’s good to check out reviewers who have submitted multiple reviews on different businesses.

OCBuyBack has an excellent rating on Yelp, with 4.4 out of 5 stars. Most reviewers shared that they had a good experience and got a fair price.

SellCell

SellCell has been around since 2008 and guarantees the most cash for your used phone. That’s because they compare prices from more than 40 buy-back companies so you can choose the highest offer. They do not buy the devices but act as a comparison site to help you choose a buyer. They accept phones in any condition.

SellCell accepts:

  • Smartphones
  • Cellphones
  • Tablets
  • Apple devices
  • Smart watches
  • Gaming consoles
  • GoPro
  • Amazon Kindle
  • Wireless headphones
  • Smart home devices

SellCell provides:

  • A fast offer comparison from multiple buy-back businesses
  • Best price guarantee
  • SellCell pays double the difference if you find a higher offer on your own

What people think about SellCell

SellCell has an excellent rating of 4.5 out of 5 stars on TrustPilot but there are only eight reviews. SellCell doesn’t have a BBB profile. There are a few mentions about SellCell on Reddit but no dedicated threads. Mostly, Reddit users mention it as an option to sell a used cellphone.

How to safely extract gold and more from electronics

The gold parts in old cellphones, smartphones, and computers are often very small and require professional help for extraction. That’s because gold extraction typically involves extreme heat and chemicals like nitric acid. Check out this video from BBC Earth Lab that shows the extensive process:

CashforElectronicScrapUSA.com (CFES), has the resources to handle recovering other precious metals like silver or copper. CFES, operated by BBB A+-rated CJ Environmental in Canton, Mass. works with businesses, schools, and individuals. 

If you are a business or school that has a large volume of scrap electronics, you can arrange for a free pickup by CFES in the New England or tri-state area including: Connecticut, Maine, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Rhode Island and Vermont.

Or, you can ship your electronics to CFES for free via FedEx or arrange for free freight shipping to the corporate office in Canton, Mass., by filling out the request form on CashforElectronicScrapUSA.com. You can usually expect to receive a check within 10 business days of receipt and appraisal.

Individuals with a few items to scrap, can contact CJ Environmental for a prepaid, insured mailing label. You can call or fill out the online quote request form. Once they receive your e-scrap and appraise its value, they can mail you a check or deposit funds via PayPal as fast as 24 hours.

In addition to electronic scrap, if you have gold and silver jewelry you no longer want, you can trade it in for cash at CashforGoldUSA.com or CashforSilverUSA.com, our top choices for selling gold, silver, and other precious metals online. This is why:

  • A+ rating from the Better Business Bureau
  • 24-hour payouts
  • 10% bonus if shipped within 7 days
  • Price match and free return guarantee
  • Insured up to $150,000 by Lloyds of London while held (plus up to $5,000 through Jewelers Mutual Insurance while in transit)

Get an offer today from CashforGoldUSA >>

How to scrap circuit boards for gold and silver

The largest amount of gold on a circuit board is on clean gold fingers. They are narrow, shiny connectors that run along the edges of circuit boards.

To scrap a circuit board for gold and silver:

  1. Unscrew your laptop or computer (make sure it’s unplugged from any electrical outlets). You can Google “how to open your laptop” and add the brand and model for specific instructions. For example, “how to open your Dell Inspiron 15 laptop.” 
  2. Locate the circuit board you wish to remove. You’ll need a small screwdriver made for electronics, which can be found in any hardware store.
  3. Remove the screws holding it in place.
  4. Detach any connections.
  5. Take the circuit board out of the computer.

How to scrap motherboards for gold

To scrap a motherboard, you also have to remove it from its device:

  1. Unplug and open the laptop or desktop computer, following Google instructions for your specific model.
  2. Locate the motherboard. The motherboard is a very large circuit board. You can search Google for “how to remove a motherboard” for help. 
  3. Using the proper-sized screwdriver, remove the screws that connect the motherboard to the computer.
  4. Disconnect any attachments like cables and wires that feed the motherboard.
  5. Take the motherboard out of the computer.

You can also go to the manufacturer’s website to download a product manual or contact their customer service department by phone or email if you need more help.

How to scrap a hard drive

A hard drive’s scrap value can vary, depending on whether you have the included circuit board or not. 

To remove the hard drive:

  1. Open the desktop or laptop computer. 
  2. Locate the hard drive. Hard drives look like a large rectangular box, and are often encased in metal.
  3. Detach any connectors.
  4. Remove any screws holding it in place.
  5. Pull the hard drive out of the computer.

Where to recycle e-waste and old computers for cash

You can recycle your old devices by mail or in-person at an electronic scrap yard — search ​​”electronic scrap yard near me” — or through a reputable online scrap electronic buyer like CJ Environmental.

Since electronic equipment does not break down in landfills, recycling e-waste and old computers for cash is a smart way to reduce waste, remove clutter from your home, and earn money.

CashforElectronicScrapUSA.com

CashforElectronicScrapUSA.com (CFES USA) is a reputable option for businesses and schools to recycle old electronics. It’s run by CJ Environmental, which boasts an A+ Better Business Bureau rating.

CFES USAs offers top-dollar for electronics scrap. They also provide proof of data removal and secure destruction upon request.

CJ Environmental helps businesses and individuals recycle e-waste, old computers, cellphones, and other electronics for cash.

Electronic scrap yards “near me”

If you want to work with a local business to recycle your electronic scrap, search Google for “electronic scrap yards near me” to see a list of local electronic scrap yards. 

You can contact the scrap yards to find out if they pay for scrap, as some actually require a fee to scrap certain items, much like companies that help you get rid of junk.

33 things to sell to make money from the stuff around your house

FAQs about scrapping electronics like a computer for cash

Are electronics worth scrapping?

That depends on how many unused electronics you have and whether you have the knowledge/ability to extract the valuable parts within them. If you have a single cellphone, for example, you may only get about $2 for its scrap content.

Electronic scrap buyers will pay you more for individual parts like hard drives or the gold fingers they contain than unassembled electronic devices because of the work it takes to extract their metal content.

If you are looking to make real money scrapping electronics, you’d have to scrap items in bulk. If not, e-scrap can be an occasional way to make a few extra dollars.

How can I get money for old electronics?

Work with a reputable business like CJ Environmental to recycle your old electronics for cash. Once your item is received and appraised, you can expect a payout in as little as 24 hours via paper check or PayPal.

Which electronics contain the most gold?

Older, large electronics have the most gold inside of them. Think Betamax, large VCRs, and outdated, bulky desktop systems or network computers with multiple hard drives.

How much is a scrap laptop worth?

What a scrap laptop is worth depends on what shape it’s in. According to Boardsort.com, a non-working laptop with a good screen (no cracks) can go for as much as $1.10 per pound. Laptops can weigh between 2-8 pounds. If the laptop screen is broken, you can get $0.70 per pound.7

How much do circuit boards scrap for?

Circuit boards come in all sizes and functions, from laptop motherboards to small cellphone boards. If you are able to extract and clean parts like gold fingers, you could get as much as $40 per pound according to Boardsort.com and you can expect anywhere from $0.20 to $14 per pound for most circuit boards.8

How much do circuit boards scrap for?

Circuit boards come in all sizes and functions, from laptop motherboards to small cellphone boards. If you are able to extract and clean parts like gold fingers, you could get as much as $40 per pound according to Boardsort.com. You can expect anywhere from $0.20 to $13 per pound for most circuit boards.

What should I do with an old TV?

You can recycle a TV for cash, whether it is old or you just don’t need it anymore. You can sell older model televisions, also known as tube TVs and projection TVs, as well as newer models like flat screens and LED TVs on sites like:

  • ebay
  • Craigslist
  • OfferUp
  • Facebook Marketplace
  • VarageSale

Or, you can search for “TV repair shops near me” to see if a local business is willing to pay you for your TV.

If your TV is broken, you can likely still get cash for it because some buyers are interested in scrapping its parts. Just be very detailed with your description and take lots of pictures if you sell it online or through an app.

What is electronic scrap?

Electronic scrap, or e-scrap, describes the valuable parts of electronics after you can no longer use them. Whether you are upgrading a laptop or smartphone, or if you have electronics that no longer work, there is still value in the parts.

What computer parts have gold?

You can find gold in: circuit boards, motherboards, and hard drives.

Are electronics worth scrapping?

If you need a few extra dollars and have in-demand parts like gold fingers, a gold-fingered RAM, or certain gold cap computer chips, yes it is worth it. With those kinds of parts, you can make anywhere from $40 to $175.

Which electronics contain the most gold?

Older, large electronics have the most gold inside of them. Think Betamax, large VCRs, and outdated, bulky desktop systems or network computers with multiple hard drives.

How much is a scrap laptop worth?

It depends on what shape it’s in. According to Boardsort.com, a non-working laptop with a good screen (no cracks) can go for as much as $1.35 per pound. Laptops can weigh between 2-8 pounds. If the laptop screen is broken, you can get $0.80 per pound.

How much do circuit boards scrap for?

Circuit boards come in all sizes and functions, from laptop motherboards to small cellphone boards. Some have high-end parts like gold fingers that will get you as much as $40 per pound according to Boardsort.com. You can expect anywhere from $0.20 to $13 per pound for most circuit boards.

SOURCES

  1. “Metallic resources in smartphones.” ScienceDirect. October 2020. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0301420720301392
  2. “How to Remove Your Personal Information Before You Get Rid of Your Computer.” July 2022. Federal Trade Commission Consumer Advice. https://consumer.ftc.gov/articles/how-remove-your-personal-information-you-get-rid-your-computer
  3. “Certified Electronics Recyclers.” February 27, 2023. United States Environmental Protection Agency. https://www.epa.gov/smm-electronics/certified-electronics-recyclers
  4. “How Much Gold Is in Your Computer and How Efficient It Is to Reclaim It.”  Interesting Engineering. Jun 21, 2023. https://interestingengineering.com/innovation/how-much-gold-is-in-your-computer-and-how-efficient-it-is-to-reclaim-it
  5. “Recycled Cell Phones—A Treasure Trove of Valuable Metals.” U.S. Geological Survey. https://pubs.usgs.gov/fs/2006/3097/fs2006-3097.pdf
  6. “How Much Gold is in Smartphones and Computers?” Dell Technologies. https://www.dell.com/en-us/blog/how-much-gold-is-in-smartphones-and-computers/
  7. “Boardsort.com current payout rates per pound.” January 27, 2024. Boardsort. https://boardsort.com/payout.php
  8. “Boardsort.com current payout rates per pound.” January 27, 2024. Boardsort. https://boardsort.com/payout.php

Heirloom, inherited, estate and antique jewelry, as well as jewelry you received as a gift but never wear, broken chains and divorce-tainted wedding bands are often best sold instead of collecting dust — especially since gold prices reached record highs topping $2,480 in July, and are up around 30% year to date. 1

In this guide, we present an overview of how to sell your gold, diamond, pearl and gemstone rings, necklaces, chains and earrings, and unpack at the best places to sell jewelry, including our top recommendations, which might surprise you:

Tips for selling jewelry

  1. Understand what your jewelry is worth
  2. Work with a reputable buyer
  3. Don’t accept the first offer + negotiate

Where to sell your jewelry

Reviews of 7 online jewelry buyers

  1. CashforGoldUSA
  2. Abe Mor
  3. Circa
  4. myGemma, formerly WP Diamonds
  5. Louped
  6. The RealReal
  7. Worthy

FAQs about selling jewelry

Bottom line: It’s OK to sell your jewelry

Quick take: Our top choices for selling jewelry

We had a writer secret-shop several local and online jewelry and gold buyers when selling a gold chain bracelet. More about her experience about selling gold jewelry.

These were the end results:

Gold buyerBBB ratingBusiness typeFinal offer% of spot gold price*
CashforGoldUSAA+ (accredited since 2020Online gold buyer$41.4967%
Alloy MarketA (accredited since 2023)Online gold buyer$41.4966%
Raleigh Gold JewelryA+ (accredited since 2008)Jewelry store$4064%
National PawnA+ (not accredited)Pawn shop$5079.5%
JewelRecycleA+ (accredited since 2009)Local gold buyer$5180%
  • Best for immediate cash: A pawnshop or gold buyer in your community can offer helpful service and a very fairprice.
  • Best online jewelry buyer: CashforGoldUSA. It’s family-owned, based in the United States and pays fast. In a related post, we explain how CashForGoldUSA works and what the selling experience was like for our writer.

Not ready to sell today? Best for getting a jewelry loan: Diamond Banc. Check out our Diamond Banc review

If you make jewelry and want to know where to sell it, this Reddit thread and community has all the answers:

Where do you sell your jewelry?
byu/marko-knives injewelrymaking

Tips for selling your selling your jewelry

Here is how to assess the value of your gold, diamond, gemstone or other jewelry:

1. Understand what your jewelry is worth

A man inspecting a ring. Check here for a guide to selling jewelry for cash (+ negotiation tips).

It’s important to understand exactly what your jewelry is made of, and the approximate market value of the karat of gold and/or diamonds, weight, and in some instances, the brand.

If your item is worth about $1,000 or more, it can be worthwhile to invest in a jewelry appraisal or, for diamonds, a lab report  — documents that spell out the value of your item. 

Selling gold jewelry

Read this guide to selling jewelry for cash (+ negotiation tips).

Most gold jewelry, unless it very significant in size, a special design or made by a noteworthy brand like Tiffany or Cartier, is likely to be bought for its scrap gold value. This includes gold chains and necklaces, gold wedding bands and most gold charms and brooches.

This is good news if your item is dated, broken or small — it is still always valuable and will get you cash.

Familiarize yourself with gold hallmarks, or stamps, that signify the karat — even if you think you know what you have.

This guide explains how to understand the value and price of your gold, as well as where to sell it for the highest price.

This chart gives you an idea of the value of amount of gold per karat in yellow gold, assuming a price of $2,300 per troy ounce:

StampPurity% goldSpot value
99924 karat99.9% $2,297.70
99022 karat99%$2,277
75018 karat75% $1,725
58514 karat58.3% $1,345.50
3759 karat37.5%$862.50

Is my gold real? How to tell

Selling diamond jewelry

Familiarize yourself with the market value of diamonds (which have dramatically fallen in recent years), as well as understand the cut, carat, clarity and other qualities of your stone.

If your chain features diamonds of at least .5 carat center stone, a diamond appraisal will evaluate the stones on the 4 C’s: color, cut, clarity, and carat and can be helpful in the sales process — though they cost around $200 or more.

We published a guide to selling diamonds: More on how to sell diamonds and diamond jewelry.

You can always take your jewelry to a pawnshop or jewelry store where they can weigh your necklace and give you an estimate — or a quote to buy.

As for pearl or gemstone jewelry, unless your ring, earrings or necklace are very special with a very large and valuable center stone, or by a famous designer, the stone is likely worthless, though the precious metal will be worth the spot value.

2. Work with a reputable buyer

Sources of information on buyers include:

  • Better Business Bureau
  • Trustpilot
  • Yelp!
  • Google searches
  • Friends
  • Family

The next section explains where to find gold buyers.

3. Don’t accept the first offer + negotiate

A woman buying jewelry. Check out this guide to selling jewelry for cash (+ negotiation tips).

When it comes to selling your necklaces for cash, you can always negotiate any offer, including with online buyers. Here are some tips for how to negotiate prices:

  1. Express appreciation: Start by thanking the buyer for their offer. Being polite and respectful can create a more positive relationship for negotiation.
  2. Ask for clarification: Politely ask the buyer to explain how they arrived at their offer. This can help you understand their perspective and give you an opportunity to point out any unique or valuable aspects of your necklace.
  3. Mention any special features or history: Your sentimental attachment to the piece won’t add value, but if your necklace has unique features, such as a rare design, special craftsmanship, or historical significance, be sure to mention them.
  4. Research current market prices: Knowledge of the current market price for gold can be a powerful negotiating tool. You can say, “I’ve done some research, and I know that the current market price for gold is [mention the price]. Can you match or come close to that?”
  5. Mention competitive offers: If you’ve received other offers or have the option to sell to multiple buyers, bring in documentation. Saying something like, “I have another offer from a different buyer for [mention the offer amount], but I’d prefer to sell to you if we can work out a better deal” may encourage them to offer more.
  6. Be willing to walk away: Express your willingness to walk away from the deal can put pressure on the buyer to make a better offer. Try: “I appreciate your offer, but I was hoping for something closer to [your desired amount].” The pack up to leave.
  7. Negotiate incrementally: Instead of outright rejecting the offer, you can propose a counteroffer that’s slightly higher than their initial offer but still reasonable. Show a willingness to compromise.

6 places to sell your jewelry safely

There are pros and cons of selling to different types of business. Rest assured there are many quality buyers both locally and online.

Our recommendations are based on:

  • Online reviews from customers
  • Speed to cash
  • Better Business Bureau ratings
  • Reports from reputable publications
  • Age of the company
  • Location of the jewelry buyer (based in the U.S.)
  • Ease of use of their websites
  • Transparency into their process
  • Overall sentiment that these are quality businesses that care about their customers

1. Sell to pawnshops

Most pawn shops do buy jewelry, including scrap gold like broken necklaces and inherited jewelry. If you need cash immediately — or are interested in a pawn loan — a reputable pawn broker can be a good option.

  • Pro: Quick money, possibility to get your necklace back within 30 days, could get a fair price working with a trusted local business. 
  • Con: Might get a low-ball offer, you may feel embarrassed dealing with a pawnbroker or being seen in public selling your valuables

2. Sell your jewelry online

There are numerous quality online buyers that will pay you money for your gold, silver, and platinum jewelry. You can consult the Better Business Bureau, Yelp, Reddit and Trustpilot to read customer reviews. 

Pros of selling online: Convenience, as with some buyers, you can complete the entire process from home. Some have best-price guarantee, and any quality online jewelry or metals buyer will send a free round-trip mailer and jewelry insurance.

Cons: Takes a few days or more (depending on the buyer)

Based on our exhaustive review, CashforGoldUSA.com is our top choice to sell your gold chain online and the best place to sell your gold necklace period. Read our review of CashforGoldUSA.

A couple recent sales to CashforGoldUSA:

14k gold chain necklace sold for $1,773.45:

14k gold necklace sold for $1,773 on CashforGoldUSA.

10k gold chain necklace sold for $430.69:

14k gold necklace sold for $430 on CashforGoldUSA.

3. Sell your jewelry to your local jeweler

We understand that some people have an urgency, and the best jewelry buyer might be the one that offers the fastest turnaround. In that case, a local jeweler you find “near me” may give you a fair value of your jewelry in cash on the spot.

Selling your gold chain, diamond ring or other jewelry at a local jewelry store is a good option, especially if you know a business you trust. 

  • Pro: Could be a fair payout, quickly. Some jewelers offer trade-in deals.
  • Con: Might not get highest offer, and it can be embarrassing to have to sell your jewelry before people you know.

4. Sell to cash-for-gold stores

Cash for gold stores can give you quick cash but have a reputation for low payouts. You can always get a quote, negotiate and shop around.

  • Pro: Immediate cash, local
  • Con: Payout may be low 

5. Local or online auctions

If your gold necklace or chain is pretty standard, nothing special, a gold buyer will most likely offer a payout based on the day’s spot gold price, and send it to a refinery to melt down.

However, if you have a significant piece of jewelry or a loose diamond that will sell for at least $1,000, or is a special antique, a marked brand or is a popular style,  it is possible a local or online jewelry auction platform may be interested — especially if your necklace is part of a larger estate collection.

  • Pro: Possibly could fetch a higher price 
  • Con: Not immediate cash, may not sell for as much as you like

6. Sell directly

You can always post your chain and try to sell it directly to individuals, or through antique or consignment stores. Check out sites like:

Pros and cons, of course:

  • Pro: You may get a higher price, and you can do business locally if you prefer 
  • Con: A lot of work dealing with flaky people, possibly having to package and shipping your item, or it not selling it all. 

21 apps for selling stuff online or locally

7 online jewelry buyers

Unless you need the cash immediately, an online jewelry buyer can be the best position to offer you the highest price, as they benefit from not needing expensive retail rent, and you benefit from the competitive online market.

Other benefits of selling to an online buyer include that a quality buyer will provide free, door-to-door shipping, the privacy of never leaving your house, and full insurance. Many rural communities do not have many local options.

Here are some of the most reputable online buyers:

1. CashforGoldUSA

We like this family-owned company for many reasons, including that they give a 10% bonus when you send in your shipment within a week and have helpful customer service and have many options for shipping and payment.

Pricing and payment

  • Get paid within 24 hours
  • 10% bonus if you send your item within 7 days
  • 100% highest price guarantee

Reputation

  • Better Business Bureau rating of A+
  • Founded 2005
  • 4.4/5 Trustpilot stars

Safety and insurance

  • Free, secure mailer or FedEx package sent to your home
  • Buys gold, silver, platinum jewelry, watches, coins and scrap
  • Insurance up to $150,000

Value add

  • Guaranteed highest price
  • If you do not accept their offer, you can get your item back immediately, free of charge
  • Your choice of shipping: USPS or FedEx, or print label at home for fastest process
  • Accepts all diamonds, gold, sterling silver and gemstones regardless of size or quality (other jewelry buyers have minimum diamond size or resale value)

Read our CashforGoldUSA review or get an immediate quote from CashForGoldUSA now>>

2. Abe Mor

Founded in 1964, New York-based and family-run Abe Mor has one of the largest presences in the online diamond buyer market.

They accept only diamond jewelry and loose diamonds of at least .50 carats, including designer diamond jewelry — like engagement rings from Tiffany & Co, Cartier, and Harry Winston — but they will pay you for the gold and platinum content of your jewelry if it’s set with eligible diamonds.

Abe Mor pros

  • A+ BBB rating, zero customer complaints
  • Free shipping 
  • Free insurance up to $50,000 with additional available for purchase

Abe Mor cons

  • Does not buy other types of jewelry or gemstones
  • Only accepts diamond jewelry at least 0.5 carats in size
  • Appraisals are conducted by in-house Abe Mor staff, though you can request GIA authentication
  • May reject diamonds if it does not need them in its inventory
  • Typical time from shipment to payment is longer than other sites, though Abe Mor will overnight a check upon request
  • Pays within 2 to 4 days upon acceptance of an offer

Check out our Abe Mor review and sell your diamond jewelry with Abe Mor today >>

3. Circa

Circa accepts high-end branded jewelry, as well as diamonds of at least .4 carats, and engagement rings. They will also purchase historical or estate jewelry including pieces such as: Antique, Edwardian, Georgian, Art Nouveau, Belle Epoque, Art Deco, Retro and Modern.

Whether in-person or online, if you accept Circa’s offer, you will be paid immediately via check, bank transfer, or gift card (worth up to 120% of the purchase offer) toward a jewelry purchase from Circa.

If you provide a grading report from the GIA, EGL, IGI, AGS, GSI, GCAL, IIDGR, or HRD, Circa provides a guaranteed offer range.

Circa pros

  • A+ Better Business Bureau rating
  • Works in partnership with diamond retailer Blue Nile
  • Promises to offer a high price to you by cutting out the middleman
  • Website’s videos and posts create transparency
  • Fully insured FedEx delivery — both from you to Circa, as well as returns, when relevant
  • 14 physical locations (11 in the U.S. and 3 international)
  • Claims that more than 90% of its customers receive a final offer price higher than the midpoint of the guaranteed range (which includes shipping and insurance)

Circa cons

  • This buyer only deals in jewelry with a diamond of at least .4 carats
  • If you do not have a lab report, you must send in your item for evaluation and grading before an offer is made
  • That offer is good for just 7 days, after which you have to start the whole process over again

In short, Circa is a solid company that brings the Blue Nile experience full circle, promising to offer jewelry sellers high prices by removing the middleman.

4. myGemma, formerly WP Diamonds

myGemma, formerly WP Diamonds, has a solid reputation as an online luxury jewelry buyer, and promises to get you a fair price for your diamond or designer jewelry, loose stones (diamonds of at least .5 carats), handbags, watches, and luxury accessories.

However, theirs is a more traditional buyback platform, in that myGemma’s in-house team of GIA-trained gemologists and industry veterans will evaluate your jewelry, then make an offer. Take it or leave it.

myGemma pros

  • Reputable buyer with an A+ BBB rating
  • Clean, easy-to-use site
  • Pays cash for your jewelry
  • Easy process, including FedEx round-trip shipping, and insurance for the full value of your items
  • Choose to do business via email or phone
  • Sell in as little as 24 hours: myGemma buys your jewelry directly, which means there are no online listings or auctions to wait for, no haggling or negotiating — simply their best price upfront
  • No fees are deducted from your final offer — the amount you hear is the amount you get paid.

myGemma cons

  • Evaluation is done by an internal appraiser, not a neutral third-party laboratory like GIA, which Worthy uses
  • There is just one offer, not a price set by a dynamic marketplace

In summary, myGemma is a reputable online diamond and jewelry buyer, that has been around for a long time. It is the fastest way to sell diamonds safely online to the experts.

Read my myGemma review to learn more.

5. Louped

Louped (formerly I Do Now I Don’t) is an online jewelry marketplace that will either buy your diamond jewelry directly or allow you to list it at your own price to online buyers — sort of like ebay for diamond and fine jewelry.

Louped pros

  • Choice between direct sale or marketplace listing
  • Possibility to sell item for much more through online listing
  • You choose the sales price 

Louped cons

  • D- BBB rating with many customer complaints
  • Website is confusing and the sales process is not always clear
  • Direct sale is based off of a single, in-house evaluation
  • Payment is slow (only one payout date per month)
  • VIP selling service is only available for items valued to be worth at least $5,000 
  • Unless you opt into VIP selling service, you are responsible for shipping and insurance costs
  • $20 fee to return your items if you reject offer higher than initial estimate
  • Can only list items worth at least $250 on Louped Marketplace

Read our full Louped review.

6. The RealReal

The RealReal is an online marketplace for luxury resale items, including fine jewelry. The site prices your consigned jewelry based on current market trends, and you get paid a commission up to 70% depending on the list price of your items.

Pros of The RealReal

  • Accredited by the Better Business Bureau with an A+ rating
  • 4/5 stars on Trustpilot

Cons of The RealReal

  • Numerous customer complaints on the BBB site about long wait times to process consigned items, items not being returned in the same condition they were sent, unapproved markdowns, and difficulty resolving issues with customer service
  • No guarantee your item will sell — most successful jewelry sales are by professional jewelers or others who have the ability to professionally photograph, display and market their jewelry
  • Must schedule an appointment to meet with a representative and be accepted to sell

7. Worthy

If you have jewelry valued at $1,000 or more, including a diamond engagement ring, other diamond or gemstone jewelry, or branded items from Tiffany, Cartier or another high-end jeweler, then consider Worthy.com, an online marketplace where hundreds of vetted buyers bid on your item.

Typically, the center diamond of an engagement ring of at least .5 carats will sell for $1,000. Worthy also accepts lab-grown diamonds of at least 3 carats. Worthy is A+ BBB rated, and insures your item up to $100,000 with Lloyds of London.

Worthy pros

  • A+ BBB rating
  • 4.6 rating with Trustpilot
  • High consumer reviews
  • Free lab GIA report
  • Cool website that helps you understand the value of your jewelry

Worthy cons

  • Takes longer than other platforms
  • Some users find the process overly complicated
  • Focused exclusively on diamond and high-end branded jewelry
  • Strict minimum of items that will sell for at least $1,000

Read my Worthy review.

FAQs about selling jewelry

What is the best way to sell expensive jewelry?

In the past, we have recommended selling expensive jewelry, especially those with large diamonds, or branded, luxury jewelry such as those from Tiffany, Cartier or Buglari through a reputable online jewelry platform like Worthy or myGemma — national companies that can efficiently evaluate your diamond or other jewelry, safely ship it, evaluate it by trusted experts and appraisers.

Before you get too excited, however, note that diamond prices have dropped about 30% since their peak in summer 2022, and buyback prices reflect this change:2

IDEX December 11, 2024 report
IDEX December 11, 2024 report

For that reason, we recommend online buyer Diamonds USA, which buys all sizes and qualities of diamonds, quickly, and has a strong reputation, or Worthy.com, which specializes in larger diamonds and name-brand pieces.

Complete guide to symbols stamped on jewelry

Can you sell jewelry to a jewelry store?

Working with a local jeweler can be a solid choice if you have a jeweler you know and trust. This can also ensure a quick, cash sale, and many jewelers offer you a bonus if you chose to take store credit.

However, it may be worth the time to also get a quote from a local pawnshop or send in your jewelry to an online jewelry buyer get a second or third offer.

Is it better to sell jewelry to a pawn shop or jewelry store?

Pawnbrokers have a bad reputation for ripping off sellers — but jewelry stores can short-change jewelry sellers, too. The only way to know which is better is shop around, ask local friends and neighbors for recommendations and compare. Getting a quote does not commit you to selling at any of these options.

Is it safe selling jewelry online?

Selling jewelry online with a reputable buyer that insures your item, gives you a FedEx or USPS tracking number and has a robust online presence including Better Business Bureau and other online review sites. Since the online jewelry buyers rely on these reputation sites, they live and breathe customer service and reviews. I feel confident that the buyers listed on this site are honest and safe.

How much is my gold chain worth? What about a broken chain, or a gold ring?

Basic gold items are generally worth the spot price of gold, minus the buyer’s commission — which should be around 20% at most reputable places.

For example, a simple gold chain — broken or in-tact — could fetch you $100 to $200. A men’s gold wedding band may get you $100 to $200 as well.

Is it worth selling jewelry online?

Selling jewelry online with a reputable buyer that insures your item, gives you a FedEx or USPS tracking number and has a robust online presence including Better Business Bureau and other review sites. 

Sell jewelry online can net a higher payout, convenience of not having to leave your home, and total privacy, since your friends and neighbors won’t see you selling your items in town.

Platinum vs white gold: Which is more valuable?

White gold vs yellow gold: What’s the difference, which is worth more?

Sterling vs plated vs white gold: How to tell the difference

What is the best website to sell used jewelry?

CashforGoldUSA buys all gold, silver, diamond and gemstone jewelry, coins, flatware and tableware via overnight shipping. The Boston-based company has an A+ Better Business Bureau rating and hundreds of high Trustpilot reviews, and promises to pay within 24 hours of accepting terms.

Bottom line: It’s OK to sell your jewelry

Many relationships involve precious jewelry — investments that represented care, love, tradition. These may be romantic or family relationships. Your jewelry may be a gift or an inheritance.

Those engagement rings, watches, necklaces, earrings, gold chains, and bracelets can linger in velvet-lined jewelry boxes for years — or even the remainder of the new owner’s life!

Even if that jewelry is worth tens of thousands of dollars, it is still clutter to you.

It all holds energy, good or bad.

Cleanse out the bad energy, welcome the good.

Even if you are unsure whether the value of the gold or diamonds may go up soon, money in your pocket today is 100% guaranteed, vs the unknown of future prices. Plus, you can pay off debt which saves money in interest, or put money into a 401k or 529, which saves money on taxes — guaranteed.

Get an offer for your jewelry from CashforGoldUSA, and receive a 10% bonus if you send in your item within 7 days >>

SOURCES

  1. “Gold edges higher after US jobs report supports rate cut bets,” by Anna Anil for Reuters. Dec. 6, 2024
    https://www.reuters.com/markets/commodities/gold-heads-second-weekly-fall-focus-us-payrolls-data-2024-12-06/
  2. IDEX Diamond Index. November, 2024. http://www.idexonline.com/diamond_prices_index
Where can I sell my jewelry for the most money?

Unless you need the cash immediately, an online jewelry buyer is in the best position to offer you the highest price, as they benefit from not needing expensive retail rent, and you benefit from the competitive online market.

What is the best way to sell expensive jewelry?

We recommend selling expensive jewelry online to a reputable online jewelry buyer because these are large, national companies that can efficiently evaluate your diamond or other jewelry, safely ship it, evaluate it by trusted experts and appraisers and have national reputations at stake, which motivates them to offer a high price and good customer service.

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