eharmony review: A good site for quality relationships?

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“I’m thinking of trying online dating, but I have no idea where to start!”

This is such a common challenge for single moms. While they may have been out of the dating market for years (or, face it: decades), or ready to try a new way to meet people, online dating is alluring.

But, it also comes with all kinds of questions, including which site to use:

A swipe app? A niche site such as Equestrian Singles or Mullet Passions? (Yes, these are actual sites!) Or a more mainstream site, with members from all walks of life with varying interests in all kinds of dating: serious, casual, sexy, long-term?

If you are sure you want a serious, long-term, committed relationship or marriage, there are two clear leaders in the dating site scene: eharmony has long established itself as the leader in connecting singles for meaningful partnership. Get 25% off with code WSM25 now >>

Does anyone use eharmony anymore?

Yes! eharmony has about 750,000 paid subscribers and 10 million active users.

eharmony site frequently markets with the line:

“Every day, an average of 438 singles marry a match they found on eharmony. It's FREE to review your single, compatible matches!”

eHarmony stands out among online dating platforms with:

  • Free basic version
  • A+ Better Business Bureau rating
  • Video dating
  • Each profile is vetted to prove members are who they say they are — including not being married
  • Good apps for both iOs and Android
  • 25% discount with code WSM25

If this sounds good, read on. Or check out eharmony now >>

What is eharmony?

eharmony is not a site for hookups and booty calls. For those encounters, there are other quality places to get your needs met.

The pros and cons of all the major dating sites are explained in detail in this post, Which dating sites are best for single moms? But before you rush and sign up, here’s what you need to know about eHarmony first to make sure it’s the right choice for you.

How does eharmony work?

eharmony uses science to match you and potential partners.

In this swipe-happy generation, it can be tough to make a real connection. For many, the mentality is “hot or not,” which, for those seeking a genuine relationship, can make online dating sometimes feel empty, even mean-spirited.

That’s why eharmony is so amazing; instead of relying on looks alone, all members must take a compatibility quiz upon signing up, which works to determine who your best matches will be.

eHarmony uses actual science, not just your likes and dislikes, to match you with potential suitors who really “get” you, and with whom you have the highest chances of a meaningful connection.

eharmony uses what it calls “main effects,” which is “the potential direct impact of your traits and your partner’s traits on your and their feelings” to figure out what kind of person you should be with, making it different than almost any other dating website out there.

What is eharmony like?

Signing up for eharmony is a commitment — one that could take more than an hour of your time.

After doing the basics, including adding a pleasing photo of yourself and filling in general information such as where you live and your age, you then get hit with a 150-question compatibility quiz that asks everything from what you believe your best traits are to what qualities you want a potential mate to possess during difficult times.

If you can’t finish the questionnaire in one sitting and need more time to answer these hard-hitting questions, don’t worry, you can come back to it later.

Brace yourself; the questions will cause you to be introspective, so get ready to learn about yourself in addition to others on the site.

Examples include:

Do you go through mood swings? Does life sometimes seem meaningless? Are you attracted to black men? Do you like to spend time alone?

One of the best, and possibly the worst, qualities about eharmony is that almost nothing is left unsaid when it comes to filling out your profile. If you don’t hit on a topic in your bio, you’ve likely touched on it in your compatibility quiz. The idea is that no stone is left unturned, with the goal of increasing the chances of finding a partner with whom you will feel that elusive spark.

In this vein, users can see everyone who looks at their profile and use that information to eventually make decisions about whether they’re interested in a particular match and vice versa. Did you like the way his smile downturned a little in the corner? Send him a message!

Did you like the way he looked on that motorcycle? Tell him so! eharmony encourages you to start a chat with those matches who pique your interest, based both on the results of the compatibility quiz and physical appearance.

Does eharmony work?

The compatibility screening digs deep. eharmony’s algorithm delves into who you are as a person, a method that has proved successful for thousands of users. In a survey of 20,000 couples who married after meeting on eharmony, only 3.9 percent divorced, compared to 6.9 percent of couples who met in other ways.

With eharmony, it can be that simple and that easy to find your match. It wasn’t until I began using eharmony and had a lot more viable prospects that I finally felt online dating was a good fit for me.

Is eharmony free?

eharmony has a basic free version, but like other dating apps, to really interact with potential matches you have to sign up for a paid version.

How much does eharmony cost?

Unlike it's competitors like EliteSingles, eharmony does not have a free trial, but it does offer Wealthy Single Mommy readers a 25% discount with coupon code WSM25.

Instead, eharmony offers plans for 6-months, 12-months and 24-months subscriptions plans, with 25% discounts for first-time users.

As of November, 2020, eharmony's price is:

  • Free basic account: $0
  • 6-month membership: $42.84/mo > MOST POPULAR
  • 12-month membership: $29.84/mo
  • 24-month membership: $23.34/mo

By comparison, EliteSingles does have a free basic version, and allows you to sign up at a month at a time.

Both sites are leaders in the online dating space for singles looking for serious, long-term, committed relationships, including marriage.

Can you join eharmony for free?

eharmony does not have a free basic version. eharmony does offer Wealthy Single Mommy readers a 25% discount with coupon code WSM25.

Does eharmony do background checks?

While eharmony does not conduct criminal or other background checks, the dating site does manually verify that each profile is real, and there is no catfishing or secretly married members.

Does eharmony have an app?

Yes! eharmony's app is easy to use and has all of the same features as the desktop: survey, matching, messaging and profile management, with the goal of making meaningful connections.

  • Android and iOS.
  • Minimum ads.
  • Easy to use.

Can I cancel eharmony anytime?

Yes! You can cancel your eharmony membership at any time.

From your account settings > Billing > ‘Cancel my account.'

You can also hide your profile:

Click on the arrow next to your photo at the top of the screen > Data & Settings > Profile Visibility > click the green slider to make your profile invisible

To delete your profile:
Click the arrow next to your photo at the top of the screen > Data & Settings > Profile Status > ​​​'To permanently delete your profile, click here'

Does eharmony have a video dating app?

Video dating is now available to eharmony Premium Members who have already exchanged a few messages on the app or desktop version of the site. By setting up a video date, singles can go on virtual dates from a socially safe distance. To enable online video dating, both users must be logged into the desktop version or video dating app at the same time.

What kind of people are on eharmony?

eharmony has about 750,000 paid subscribers and 10 million active users, which means eharmony has all kinds of people!

Whether you’re Jewish, Christian, or Muslim, black, Asian or Caucasian, straight or LGBTQ, love dogs or hate chinchillas, there’s a potential special someone for every member on eharmony. However, it's important to recognize that online dating experience can also vary by geography, just like with other sites.

eharmony has long had a reputation, perpetuated by its marketing, that it attracts relationship- and commitment-minded singles.

The average age of an eharmony user is 30, while with Elite Singles, the average age is older than 30.

Best online dating sites and apps for single parents (including free versions)

Pros of eharmony

eharmony’s unique science is focused on compatibility

eharmony’s long, involved quiz and matching process really does stand out among dating sites. It serves more as a digital matchmaker, than a swipe-left-right app or speed-dating platform.

eharmony attracts more serious daters

Because of its long history of focusing on serious relationships, including marriage, eharmony appeals to singles who are looking for commitment.

Verification process for added security

What’s also nice about eharmony is its state-of-the-art ID verification, providing you with an added level of comfort and security that the person you’re meeting is who he says he is.

eharmony routinely closes accounts for a multitude of reasons, and this can give you some peace of mind when using online dating for the first time. Of course, always, always stay alert. Nothing’s a given, no matter how thorough the screening.

Instant conversation starters

eharmony requires each user to create an in-depth profile, which means you have plenty of information to use to strike up a conversation on that first phone conversation or date.

It’s a lot easier to prep for a first date when you already know that the guy has kids around the same age as yours, and doesn’t like Indian food. You may even be able to avoid a few awkward moments over appetizers, such as finding out your date is interested in making America great again in a different way than you are.

Is eharmony a good dating app for single parents?

Yes! Many eharmony users are single moms and dads—including those who find love and marriage (if that is your goal)! Thanks to eharmony security measures that ensure that each person is who they say they are, as well as the deep survey, the chances of attracting quality people who are also single parents, or open to dating a single parent, are higher than some of the more general dating apps.

The opportunity to move at your own pace

The best part about chatting on eharmony stems from their “Quick Questions” option, which allows users to select questions they would most like their matches to answer.

This is a great way to help you (and the other person) learn information about potential matches that is important to you — as well as express to other singles what your priorities are.

With the ability to chat before meeting, it's also more likely you will feel comfortable by the time you’re ready to meet for drinks or dinner. A first date can be intimidating, especially if you haven’t been on one for a while. When I first jumped back into the dating pool, I hadn’t so much as had a phone call with a dating prospect I didn’t know beforehand in decades. Having the extra cushion of “getting to know you” time made first dates less of a big deal and more of a fun experience. And isn't that the way they’re supposed to be?

Cons of eharmony

Compatibility testing isn’t always accurate

It’s difficult to trust an algorithm to find a match for you based on answers you plug into a form. There are bound to be some errors and irregularities. For the best results, fully answer every question with as much honesty as possible, just like you would with any other dating site as well as in real life!

However, you can also search for a partner by other factors, including interests, education, religion, etc.

The more you know, the worse a date can be

Sometimes a first date is filled with magic because you spent the entire time learning about someone you knew nothing about before. Sometimes, especially when you have experienced heartache and disappointment, a long list of information about a potential date can actually be a long list of reasons to talk yourself out taking a risk and saying yes to meeting.

With so much information available to you beforehand, you run the risk of losing some of the butterflies you may have felt otherwise. But what I can attest to is this: some of the best conversations I’ve had while on a first date stemmed from a tidbit from the guy’s profile, leading to a greater understanding of the individual and a much more meaningful connection.

Surprises aren’t always pleasant, however, and a spark does sometimes lead to a fire. That said, being prepared never hurt anyone and online dating led me to my most successful relationship so far.

Unlike other apps and websites, eharmony doesn’t want you to be a member forever. The goal of the site is to take your online relationship offline.

Is eharmony worth it?

Yes. eharmony’s marketing tagline reads: “Every 14 Minutes Someone Finds Love On eharmony. Over 2 Million Have Found Love. The #1 Trusted Dating Site. 2018 Survey of 1,616 U.S. Singles.” So it is not surprising that many users offer positive feedback about their experience with the site. 

Accredited and in business since 2001, eharmony has an A+ rating with the Better Business Bureau. 

However, when using any online dating site, there is a caveat: finding love takes time and can leave some daters feeling emotional and unsatisfied when it doesn’t happen as fast as they want. Here’s what a few happy customers have to say:

eharmony reviews

According to Consumer Affairs, one reviewer, J, from Texas met their spouse on eharmony. Despite the time investment needed to set the profile up, this reviewer liked the detail required because it was helpful for weeding out people looking to hook up, not date. The lengthy process also allowed better evaluation of potential prospects, and ease of communication assisted in the vetting process pre-date, saving daters time and money. 

Irene, a user from Maryland, met her husband Joe on eharmony. Married 9 years, she says she enjoyed numerous relationships over the years from the site before meeting the one. “You get what you pay for,” she wrote.

Scott from Indiana, who was divorced, met his future wife after a few bad matches on the site. Referring to the site’s matching process, he says: “It does work if you let it.” The couple has been married more than a decade.

eharmony reviews on Yelp

There are plenty of reviews of eHarmony on Yelp – including many complaints — though almost all are from many years ago. More recent reviews on Consumer Affairs are rated as helpful:

 eharmony is a dating site that aims to help its users find a serious relationship. Our review of the pros and cons, and price of this app.
 eharmony is a dating site that aims to help its users find a serious relationship. Our review of the pros and cons, and price of this app.
 eharmony is a dating site that aims to help its users find a serious relationship. Our review of the pros and cons, and price of this app.

eharmony reviews on Reddit

eharmony has plenty of play on Reddit – including both success and horror stories for online dating in general, and eharmony in particular:

eHarmony review on Reddit - pros and cons, success stories and horror stories

Is the LGBTQ community welcomed on eharmony?

eharmony arose during a time when the world wasn’t as accepting of a place as it should have been. In 2005, eharmony became the subject of a very public lawsuit as a result of its discrimination against members sexual preference.

However, today eharmony welcomes everyone, regardless of sexuality, and many LGBTQ are members on the site. The search function allows you to search for same-sex partners.

EliteSingles vs. eharmony dating sites

In the black hole that online dating sites and apps can be, Elite Singles and eharmony stand out with promises of serious, long-term, committed relationships.

Which one is better?

Short answer: While both are quality dating sites, EliteSingles has a free version, is more affordable, and offers a more dynamic user experience. It also attracts more educated, slightly older singles. EliteSingles also has a higher Better Business Bureau rating: A+.

EliteSingleseharmony
Method200-point personality test, dating preference profile, and free personality report.150-point personality test and personality profile.
ConnectionSerious, long-term, committed relationships.Serious, long-term, committed relationships.
Typical user90% are aged 30+,
82% have college degrees
Average age: 30
PriceFree basic account: $0
3-month membership: $57.95/mo
6-month membership: $44.95/mo
12-month membership: $31.95/mo


Free basic account: $0
6-month membership: $42.84/mo
12-month membership: $29.84/mo
24-month membership: $23.34/mo
25% discount with code WSM25
SecuritySLL-encrypted site, each member is verified by a human.All members must prove who they are, and site has been known to close accounts if they find the member is married, lies about themselves or otherwise violates eharmony's code of conduct.
Apps?iOs and AndroidiOs and Android
Cool featuresFree basic membership.
Free personality report.
No need to endlessly scroll, as EliteSingles chooses matches for you.
“Quick Questions” option allows users to select questions they would most like matches to answer.
Detailed personality profile.
Video dating!
BBBA+A+

Read our Elite Singles online dating website review.

Check out EliteSingles for free now >>

How does EliteSingles dating work?

Elite stands out among online dating apps because:

  • A deep personality test to make highly compatible matches
  • Hand-verified profiles
  • 82% of the members have a college education 
  • 90% of members aged 30+

Similar to eharmony, users start with an in-depth survey of 200 questions. Expect to spend a minimum of a half-hour answering questions about your hobbies, values, personality, family, morals, education, career, dating preferences and relationship goals.

You can complete this survey via EliteSingle's online, desktop platform or its iOS or Android apps.

You can then browse the site, guided by EliteSingle's ranking system, in which each member is given a score of 1-100, with the higher number indicating a higher likely compatibility based on your survey answers.

From there, you will start receiving daily emails with 5 to 7 matches. It is up to you if you want to check out these members' profiles, start a conversation or otherwise connect.

In the free basic version, you can go through the personality profile but you can't see profile photos or messages.

However, for actually connecting and seeing your potential matches, you need to upgrade to a paid version.

How much does EliteSingles cost?

Both EliteSingles and eHarmony are more expensive than other sites, but they also attract higher-income users with above-average education. They are also the two big sites that focus exclusively on helping singles find committed, serious, long-term relationships—with EliteSingles members standing out with its higher-than average education level.

EliteSingles is also less expensive than eharmony.

EliteSingles dating costs:

For new users, here are EliteSingles prices:

  • Free basic account: $0
  • 3-month membership: $32.95 / month
  • 6-month membership: $17.95 / month
  • 12-month membership: $14.95 / month

Learn more about EliteSingles membership now >>

Not sure if you're ready to date? 9 reasons dating is better as a single mom

Conclusion: EliteSingles or eharmony—which is better?

Both eharmony and EliteSingles are quality sites devoted exclusively to serious, committed partnerships based on algorithmic matches.

eharmony stands out with:

  • Higher volume of users, increasing chances of a meaningful match.
  • 3-month free guarantee
  • Video dating

One bit of advice: Each dating site out there attracts different types of people in each geographic area, so ask your friends and singles in your area who you trust which sites they like best in your city. Also, eharmony's free version is a good way to check it out without commitment—even if romantic commitment is your ultimate goal.

Check out eharmony for yourself for free >>

Or, learn more about other top dating apps — especially for single parents.

Related post:

Tips for dating a single mom (12 things NOT to say)

Why single parents should put their kids second when dating

“I want a relationship but a good man is hard to find — right?”

Match vs. eharmony dating sites

Match is a broad dating platform, serving all kinds of daters, from those seeking casual relationships to serious ones. One of the biggest challenges facing online daters is knowing whether or not the profiles they interact with are real. In 2019, the FTC sued the owners of Match Group, Inc.. owners of Match.com, Tinder, OKCupid, and PlentyOfFish, for using fake profiles to lure new customers into upgrading their free memberships to paid subscriptions. 

In contrast, eharmony vets their members with ID verification tools to prove they are who they say, beginning with not being married, and routinely closes suspicious accounts. After providing peace of mind, eharmony then curates potential matches for their members using a detailed compatibility quiz, saving time from having to scroll through endless, unviable options.

How does Match dating work?

On Match, you choose your dating preferences (including gender and age range), build your profile, and choose your subscription plan. The dating profile for Match is very comprehensive. A user can find matches either by swiping or through the “Discover” page, which helps users create customized searches and explore new profiles.

How much does Match cost?

Match dating costs nothing, but to contact matches, a user needs a paid subscription. One month costs $38.99, while three months costs an average of $20.99 per month, six months $18.99 per month, or the best deal, one year, averaging $17.99 per month. 

By contrast, eharmony has 3 basic subscription plans. A user can choose a six month plan for $29.90 a month, three month plan for $29.95 a month, or a one month plan for $59.95. 

Match.com vs. eharmony reviews

There are lengthy — mostly negative — reviews for both eharmony and Match.com on sites like Yelp and Reddit. Consider that a) people mostly post reviews with negative experiences, b) dating site success is largely reliant on the geographical region of the users, and c) the users themselves.

You can search by your own location for Yelp, which can help you get a feel for the local scene on the various dating apps — plus some funny / horrifying dating stories.

Thankfully, both sites have free versions so you can check them out for yourself!

Conclusion: Match or eharmony—which is better?

Dollar for dollar, Match costs less than eharmony. That said, you get what you pay for: the major difference between the two sites is that Match is a general dating platform intended for all kinds of dating and eharmony focuses on serious, long-term dating, increasing your chances of finding your ideal match.

To that end, eharmony offers features such as its compatibility quiz to curate matches. For the prospective user who is actively seeking a serious, long-term relationship, eharmony is worth the extra money. 

Zoosk vs. eharmony dating sites

How does Zoosk dating work?

Zoosk prides itself on being the largest dating site in the world, with 40 million users. It connects with your social media profiles to help predict your matches and allows you to scroll through profiles as well.

But because Zoosk is a diverse and broad dating site, it appeals more to users seeking all types of relationships, while eharmony caters exclusively to the serious-minded dater looking for a committed relationship, love and possibly marriage.

How much does Zoosk cost?

The basic version of Zoosk is free, but to message matches, users need the premium version. A one-month subscription costs $29.95 while the three-month subscription costs one payment of $59.95. This makes Zoosk much cheaper than eharmony but, again, you have to spend more time searching through a lot of likely incompatible profiles. Zoosk is also preferable for those who do not want to complete a comprehensive questionnaire at the beginning, while eharmony enables you to spend less time on searches later and have more time for meeting. 

Learn more in our Zoosk review >

Conclusion: Zoosk or eharmony—which is better?

One of the best reasons to use eharmony is its compatibility survey. The site sends you a list of daily matches based on your individual responses, which go beyond simple likes and dislikes into what qualities you look for in a match.

While Zoosk is less expensive, you do get what you pay for. Keep in mind, that typically, the more someone pays for something, the more they value it — and if you are seeking a financially secure partner, eharmony’s higher price indicates that daters there can afford the premium dating site. 

Bumble vs. eharmony dating sites

How does Bumble dating work?

Bumble, similar to Tinder and Hinge, is exclusively a swiping app. Bumble allows users to write a small bio, add photos, and fill in a profile complete with their interests. Bumble’s dating algorithm is largely based your Facebook profile, which you are asked to connect upon Bumble signup.

How much does Bumble cost?

Bumble’s basic plan is free. Upgrading to Bumble Boost starts at a cost of $10.99 per week, $24.99 per month, or $149.99 for a lifetime subscription. Bumble also offers premium features, such as SuperSwipes and Spotlight, which users can purchase through the in-app currency, Bumble Coins. One coin costs $1.99; 30 cost $37.99. SuperSwipes cost one coin and Spotlight costs two coins.

Conclusion: Bumble or eharmony—which is better?

What sets the female-founded Bumble apart from other dating sites is that women must message first, shifting the balance of power, at least for the time being, to them. However, there is an unintended result; some women do not message at all, leaving men unable to start the conversation and a loss of potential matches all around. 

Bumble is also app-only and does not offer a desktop version, which many users prefer for the added information a desktop site offers about matches and a larger field for viewing photos. Many users prefer to use both an app and desktop version, making eharmony the platform with the most flexibility and options.

OKCupid vs. eharmony dating sites

How does OKCupid dating work?

OKCupid is an online dating site and app that uses user-generated questions and an algorithm to match its members. It is also one of the oldest and largest online dating sites. OKCupid originally had a reputation for matching hookups and short-term relationships, but it has since evolved to encompass older and more serious members as well. It is not quite a swiping app, but not a full comprehensive profile either—OKCupid lies somewhere in the middle.

How much does OKCupid cost?

OKCupid has a free basic version, though an upgrade costing $9.99/month gives you access to premium features, such as unlimited likes, anonymous profile viewing, and advanced searches

Conclusion: OKCupid or eharmony—which is better?

If you are searching for a more serious relationship, eharmony may still be the better choice because it offers a comprehensive personality test to curate your best matches for you.

Check out eharmony now for free, with the 3-month free guarantee >>

Hinge vs. eharmony dating sites

How does Hinge dating work?

Hinge is the dating swipe app its developers say is “designed to be deleted,” meaning that it takes a more relationship-oriented approach to online dating, encouraging users to focus on personality traits based on three self-selected personality prompts, not only photos. 

How much does Hinge cost?

Hinge is free but premium features such as unlimited likes and anonymous searching costs $9.99 per month for one month, $6.99 per month for a three-month subscription, or $4.99 per month for a six-month contract.

Conclusion: Hinge or eharmony—which is better?

Both dating platforms are positioned to attract serious daters looking for long-term relationships. Hinge is app-only, unlike eHarmony, which offers both a swipe app and desktop version. Hinge is a swiping app, while eHarmony’s matching is done for you based on a long personality survey that helps the site suggest matches for you, justifying its higher price point. 

Tinder vs. eharmony dating sites

How does Tinder dating work?

Tinder, first known as a hookup app that allows anyone to make the first move. The dating app is known for younger users, but it has evolved to include singles of all ages and those looking for serious relationships.

How much does Tinder cost?

Tinder’s basic version is free. A subscription to Tinder Plus costs $9.99 per month for people under 30 and $19.99 per month for those over 30, allowing added features such as swiping on matches around the world or changing your mind after swiping right (“yes”) on someone. Subscriptions to Tinder Gold cost an additional $4.99 per month, allowing you to see who has swiped right on you first.

Conclusion: Tinder or eharmony—which is better?

For an individual looking for a serious relationship, eharmony is a better fit because it allows for in-depth profiles based on personality traits, while swipe apps rely more heavily on photos. eharmony’s higher price points tend to attract singles willing to invest in quality connections — and can afford it. 

eharmony

$0
9.5

Overall

9.5/10

Pros

  • Serious daters and relationships only
  • Detailed personality test to match connections
  • All users are vetted for authenticity

Cons

  • More passive approach to being suggested matches
  • Premium pricing

Wealthysinglemommy.com founder Emma Johnson is an award-winning business journalist, activist and author. A former Associated Press reporter and MSN Money columnist, Emma has appeared on CNBC, New York Times, Wall Street Journal, NPR, TIME, The Doctors, MONEY, O, The Oprah Magazine. Winner of Parents magazine’s “Best of the Web” and a New York Observer “Most Eligible New Yorker," her #1 bestseller, The Kickass Single Mom (Penguin), was a New York Post Must Read. A popular speaker, Emma presented at the United Nations Summit for Gender Equality. Emma's Top Single Mom Resources.

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