In assessing my 2017 business, I’ve realized that huge chunks of my income and success can be attributed to other single moms who have worked with me, advocated for me and went to bat on my behalf. My book agent? Single mom. Acquiring editor for The Kickass Single Mom? Single mom. Big contracts at banks, consulting gigs big-time media appearances and keynote speaking engagements? Single moms, single moms, single moms, single moms.
Ladies, there is a single-mom mafia, and I am so grateful to you all.
This is amazing for so many reasons. For one, it is an amazing example of women supporting women so that we all succeed. A couple of months ago I was sharing in our Facebook group Millionaire Single Moms about The Kickass Single Mom hit Amazon #1 New Release Status. A mom’s comment brought me to tears. She wrote: “Emma, your success is our success.” That is what it is really about.
Also, all this pulling-each-other up demonstrates how powerful single mothers are. That we are not, as I’ve been screaming on this blog for the past five years, relegated to social pariahs, poverty, loneliness and the matrons of messed-up kids. Single-mother led families are zooming towards the statistical majority in this country (57% of Millennial moms are unmarried), and as women overall make incredible strides in business, politics, academics and the arts, single moms are increasingly powerful positions, too. And we look out for one another.
To achieve, you have to be grateful
One of my big messages in The Kickass Single Mom is that in order to thrive, you must take stock and be grateful for all the rights, opportunities and privileges you have as a woman today. Your ability to earn, achieve and influence is unprecedented in the history of the world. As such, you have an obligation to achieve and earn. Like it or not, you are an activist. Decisions you make today influence the world. Your children are watching and learning. Women in your community are looking to you. Your decisions at work, in your community in your family inform other women what they are capable of — and inform men what they can and should expect from women.
When I was writing The Kickass Single Mom, I suffered from some small anxiety attacks. That has never happened to me before in my life. Considering that I have made my living as a writer and journalist, penning millions of words in my career, it was really weird that writing would be so stressful. But this book is a very personal one. It is also an important one. Several times I woke in the middle of the night during the writing process in a panic. This book is not about me. It is my family’s story, and I want to get it right. It is also the first big, traditionally published book about single motherhood, ever, and hundreds of thousands of copies are going to be available Oct. 17, and for months and years afterwards. I want to get this right. Because it is for all the single moms. I also want it to be a success. Because how cool would it be if a single mom — who the world tells is destined for poverty, loneliness, isolation, shame and struggle — blows up book sales? How cool would that be for all of us?