One of the big bummers about divorced families is that there are two houses. A favorite stuffed black puppy is often at the other parent’s home; homework hanging out at the wrong address, at the wrong time. Looking for your rainbow-striped socks? Probably at Daddy’s.
It can be heartbreaking to witness your children shuffle between two homes, which must sometimes feel like no home at all.
But the upside of co-parenting is that DADDY HAS A HOUSE! Here are 12 things that belong at Daddy’s house:
1. 87% of Halloween candy (minus the Butterfingers).
2. 89% of Easter candy (minus the malted chocolate eggs).
3. Any toy that makes a noise.
4. Any toy requiring batteries.
5. That tacky Ariel T-shirt your daughter WILL.NOT.STOP.WEARING.
6. Ditto the Lightening McQueen sneakers.
7. Children acting like dicks.
8. 92% of completed school work and projects.
9. Children, when you’ve just had enough.
10. The worn, dog-earned and taped-together copy of Katy Caboose. Because no rhyming book should be that long.
11. Children, when mommy has a date with that really sexy artist.
12. Children, every Wednesday evening and alternating weekends, as well as rotating holidays and two weeks in the summer and one week during winter break.
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Emma Johnson is a veteran money writer, noted blogger, bestselling author and an host of the award-winning podcast, Like a Mother with Emma Johnson. A former Associated Press Financial Wire reporter and MSN Money columnist, Emma has written for the New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Forbes, Glamour, Oprah.com, REAL SIMPLE, Parenting, USA Today and others.
The Kickass Single Mom: Be Financially Independent, Discover Your Sexiest Self, and Raise Fabulous, Happy Children (Penguin, 2017), was a #1 bestseller and was featured in hundreds of media, including The New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Fox & Friends, Oprah.com and the New York Post, which named it to its ‘Must Read” list.
Her popular blog Wealthysinglemommy.com, and podcast Like a Mother, explore issues facing professional single moms: business and career, money, sex, relationships and parenting. Emma regularly comments on these topics for outlets such as CNN, Headline News, New York Times, Wall Street Journal, Fox & Friends, CNBC, NPR, TIME, MONEY, O, The Oprah Magazine, Woman’s Day, The Doctors, and many more. She was named Parents magazine’s “Best of the Web,” one of “20 Personal Finance Influencers to Follow on Twitter” by AOL DailyFinance, “Top 15 Personal Finance Podcasts” by U.S. News, and “Most Eligible New Yorkers” by New York Observer.
A popular speaker on gender equality, Emma presented at the United Nations Summit for Gender Equality.
Emma grew up in Sycamore, Ill., and lives in New York City with her children.