This is First World Fridays #FWF (check out the first FWF here) where I share the frivolous stuff that I allow to occupy my mind, and I turn it into an expression of gratitude. Please do it the same – in the comments, Facebook, Twitter, privately within yourself. Tag it #FWF (yes, I’m asking you to tag your silent prayers) and let’s start a revolution!
My #FWF: Well, to start, I am writing a FirstWorldFriday on Sunday (in case you didn’t notice). I have a good reason: a note from myself (cuz I’m the mom) explaining I was dog-sick last week. Some weird stomach bug that had me in bed for four days. I’ll spare you the details.
But I will share the net results. As I lay in bed clutching my stomach and praying I made it to the can in time, aching from head to toe, I started to have serious worries. What if this was very serious? Who would take care of the kids? And assuming it was not serious, what if I do become sick with something serious — who would take care of the kids? And while we’re at it, I could really use some more help with the kids. Because lately I feel like they need so much more than I can give them. And while we’re at that I really need more myself. While I lay there in my own cold sweat all I could think about was how good it would feel on a zillion different levels if there was some guy there to go to the store and pick up some seltzer and Imodium and cue up Mad Men and give me a goddamn hug.
And if things are this scary now with what is probably not a serious illness, I thought, what kind off mom am I that I have created only this very fragile ecosystem for my children that is so overly dependent on me. That is messed up and I felt really, really bad about it.
- On Friday afternoon, the fever broke and I felt confident I could head to the bus stop without danger of disaster.
- I’m normally really healthy.
- I live in a country where I have access to probably too much health care and even if something were seriously wrong, there is a very good chance that it would be fixed.
- On Thursday our friend and former nanny Karen came for a scheduled dinner and when all I could do is lay down in my dark room and close my eyes and fret about the future of my family she happily gave the kids baths and read them books and gave them a banana and read to them from her journal from when she was their babysitter years ago and shared memories of them as babies. And I cannot think of a more loving thing.
- Not gonna lie: I lost 7 lbs in four days and I’m pretty happy about that.
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